The transcripts from Bill Maher's show definitely aren't rush jobs...they come out about 2 or 3 weeks after the show. But at least they do provide transcripts...which is nice.

Anyway, a while back I was bitching about how Maher was a tasteless asshole for displaying Bush at a KKK rally (ha, ha), and how Carlin was an asshole for some of the comments he made.

Now, here are the comments verbatim:

CARLIN: No one can die. Teddy bears, ribbons, candles, poems, greeting cards. You can't do it. And then they build a memorial. Someday, you know what they ought to have? A big building called "The Dead People's Building." [laughter] Shape it like a gravestone, and it just - it counts for everything that happens. And we don't have to be doing all this stuff one by one for each thing that occurs. [laughter] [applause]

You know what? Let me say this. I have one figure with me. In the last century, in the 20th century, counting military deaths, both civilian and soldiers - and counting civilian deaths sponsored by government activity - we sacrificed 196 million people in this world, 196 million people. And for us to worry about 3,000 or 100 here or 500 there. I mean, if you have grief, fine, good inside. Same with religion: keep it inside. Keep it to yourself. If you want to share it a little bit with friends and family, fine. [laughter] But don't be coming and taking over things that are kind of public, and thrusting your "GRIEF" on me. You know, that's how I feel about it. [laughter] [applause]

Yeah, cause the people putting candles and teddy bears on memorials are the real idiots, right George?

Sheesh.