Where to begin? This will be a jumbled compilation with verb tenses flying every which way. This will happen because I've been posting at Facebook, which is sometimes easier for me when I'm out of town.

*****

Yesterday evening as I drove up the mountain, I became weepy. Those of you who climb this mountain regularly know that I had to shore-up those tears fast - too dangerous to drive with blurry vision.

The thoughts that sprung to mind were that just that morning I thought I'd be driving home to live as long as allowed - that I was going home to die - that I'd had all hope yanked. (Is there a limit to the use of the word *that* in one elongated sentence? Gah.) I was tearing up because I was so grateful for the options I'd been given just a few hours earlier. Instead of going home to die, I was going home with so much new hope I nearly required a U-Haul trailer to transport it with me.

*****

Overview:

Did great with all tests. I was a perfect candidate for a lung transplant until it was revealed my PRAs (antibodies) are very high. A transfusion 31 years ago, numerous miscarriages, and three splendid full term brilliant babies are probably the reasons for the high PRAs. (Dr. Lancaster observed that consequently, my immune system is excellent.) A lot of women have these extra antibodies and it's never a problem unless they need a transplant. And, of course, I wouldn't change a thing, one tiny element of my life, if it meant I didn't have my three beautiful & brilliant children.

*****

I will not be listed at Vanderbilt. I would venture a safe guess they would've listed me. I was the perfect candidate until my PRAs were discovered. Vanderbilt doesn't treat my blood condition for transplants and they draw from a much smaller pool of donors - so the likelihood of a match is nearly zero.

So Plan B was set in motion. I have a better chance of being listed at Cleveland Clinic.

All my records are being sent to Cleveland. My Pulmonary Specialist sent a letter with a formal request and updated info about me. She assured me that we are not at all in a panic situation. (I didn't even ask but I think that was her way of saying there is plenty of time to make arrangements with Cleveland.)

All my tests results were great! I'm the healthiest sick person ever.

I'll get a call from Cleveland Clinic in 2-6 weeks to set up an appointment for an evaluation. Though I won't have to go through the paces like I did this week, I may have to repeat a few tests or procedures. Then the lead surgeon and his team will want to meet with me. (This is all in the event they will even take me on.)

If accepted into the Cleveland program it's most likely I'll be put on anti-suppressant meds to dilute/dismiss/destroy as much of the extra antibodies as possible. Cleveland Clinic does this all the time - they are a large facility.

Once listed, I'll wait for a call. I'll be able to live at home. When a donor lung becomes available, I'll get the call and a private jet will be dispatched to deliver me to Cleveland.

Vanderbilt is an amazing destination but on a much smaller scale than Cleveland. I'm most fortunate to have so many people making all this happen for me. I am so very fond and appreciative of so many people at Vanderbilt. The evaluation process this week was remarkable. Dr. Lancaster, Wendi, and Kathleen are remarkable. My team of caregivers was rock stars - seriously! We were impressive - a remarkable entourage. The lead transplant surgeon l-o-v-e-d us!

But, alas, it wasn't to be.

So, Cleveland, here I come! Cleveland Rocks! (Thanks, Betty Ann!)







*****

Thursday morning I awoke at 4 am. It was then that I finally processed the grim news I'd been given Wednesday afternoon - that had little hope for a transplant because of my PRAs.

I wrote:

I'm dying proof that it doesn't matter if a person does everything right and everything doesn't go right. Yet, I wouldn't change. Doing life right is right.

The very same evening of that morning, I was zooming up my mountain with abundant hope to give my prayer warriors.

Am I the luckiest woman in the world, or what!





Reenie & Willow




Reenie & Willow again





Willow, Alison, Mary




Reenie!





David & Alison




Alison brought me the cutest pumpkin she'd crafted




A group shot taken the evening everyone arrived. I'm so sorry I don't have a photo of Nancy Bradshaw who was such an important part of this group.