Right about now, exactly one year ago (though June 30 was a Sunday last year), I was skipping down the hallway of the fifth floor of Owen Hall at MSU, back to my room after kissing Janet for the first time. I think I even clicked my heels together. Inside my room, I jumped and bounced around, unable to keep still. I might have only gotten an hour of sleep that night because I was so excited.

It's weird to think that the relationship almost didn't happen.

It was the third week at Clarion, and I had made a comment about a fortune cookie I had gotten at this great Chinese/Vietnamese place that the group often frequented. A bunch of us were there that night, but I had maneuvered myself to sit next to Janet. The fortune I got was "Stop looking forever; true happiness is right next to you," and I about fell out of my chair. Janet definitely noticed the fortune as well. Brendan Day was on my left, so of course jokes were made that he was the source of my true happiness, but I knew better. I've gotten some eerie fortunes over the years, and I've learned to take them seriously.

A week went by. There was a blow-up during one of the critique sessions that was resolved thankfully by Leslie What, followed by a group hug. I made sure to hug Janet if no one else. Also during that week, while I was down at the Barnes & Noble on the main drag, I noticed two copies of Galveston by Sean Stewart. Janet had been telling me how interested she was in the book, but that she hadn't gotten it yet. I bought a copy for me, and one for her, then gave it to her one night after a Mafia session. Things were building, but I didn't want to move too fast and scare her off, like I had done with relationships in the past.

On Sunday, June 30, I was in my room critiquing stories for the next morning, when she knocked on my door. She asked about the comment I had made about the fortune I'd received, and nervously asked if it was about her. I was amazed by how brave she was, taking such a big risk like that. And of course I panicked. I said no, the comment wasn't about her. She exhaled and looked a little disappointed, though I could tell she was trying not to show it. She left the room.

For ten minutes I sat in my chair, shivering and breathing hard. I thought about Andy Duncan's Clarion advice, about taking chances. I thought about Janet's non-verbal cues while she had been talking, that it seemed she was wanting me to say, yes, I was talking about you with my fortune cookie comment. I tossed the manuscripts to the floor, and walked down the hall to her room quickly, before I lost my nerve. My heart pounded and my knees quivered. I reached her door, took a deep breath, and knocked.

She opened it, and I asked if she was disappointed at what I'd just told her, and she admitted that she was. I told her I'd been a coward, that of course I was talking about her, that she'd been so brave to go over there. She said I was brave to come back to her room. We admitted how attracted we were to each other. I kissed her, and her lips were the sweetest things I'd ever tasted.

I so wish we could be together today, so I could take her to a fancy restaurant, shower her with flowers, and make love until sunrise. I miss her all the time, but today has been especially hard. But I endure, because I know we'll soon be together again, and this time it'll be for the rest of our lives.

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Now Reading:
Trampoline edited by Kelly Link

Stories Out to Publishers:
14

Books Read This Year:
25

Novel Word Count:
9200