So I have decided that I definitely do not want to go back to work at the library next summer. My boss sent me a letter today with my last pay check critiquing me all over for the most part. Yes, most of it was true but in the kind of environment where I am being watched by hawks all the time I am not too happy and tend to do worse because of it. I wasn't too happy with the environment and don't think I will return. Not the place for me. Maybe being a librarian or doing public services just is not my thing.

I may consider teaching more. I think I have more skills for it than I do the fine detail work and person-person public services that is often involved in being a librarian. Also, the pay as a librarian sucks.

So I think I may be ex-ing that off my path. We'll see where the road takes me now.

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In other news I feel kind of bad because last night I went to hang out with Jay in his room and left my cell phone in mine. Well turns out Vicci tried to call me. She was really sick with a stomach bug and went to the hospital. She recruited her friend/crush and he helped her out. He did her paperwork and helped her out and everything. I'm glad he was there. But I can't feel too much guilt over it either. Shit happens. He probably took care of her better than I would regardless of awkwardness.
I took her two bottles of Pepto and a Gatoraid this morning once I found out. While I was there one of her residence's was taken away in an ambulance. She is basically the RA for two floors since the other RA is never there. She's also taking 18 credits and has a lot of responsibility to uphold with extracurricular activities. The girl may be doing too much so it's not wonder she got sick. I think there is a bug in the food though.

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So how'd it go with Jay? Pretty decent. No, we have not made any physical moves on each other. I think part of it is that we're too deeply involved in our conversations and touching each other with our eyes is good enough right now.
Time flies when I talk to him. I'm not even aware of it and I get in to this calm state. It's like we are the only two people in the world when we talk and it's a connection.
Suddenly the fire alarm is going off and you're amazed that it's midnight, can't really believe that it is.

I like him, I really do. But it's different. It isn't like an all consuming giggly-girly-crush....it's more like a knowing. That's the only way I can describe it.

As far as the physical goes why is there even any rush? I'm content just talking to him. Yes, touch would be nice but it's not something is like...a need or anything. Whenever something happens it happens. Just taking it a day at a time.

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Well I should get back to homework and trying to stay awake since I wasn't asleep until closer to 2:00am last night.

Peace, my home skillets.
~Lo