...college...

Two more years.

Two more farking years.

Can you tell I am kind of anxious to get home? I think everyone is. Last year the mood was not like this but at this point the bit is being chomped on.

I'm still trying to figure out what the hell is going on with my housing situation too due to miscommunication on both ends. At this point I do not know if I am having a roommate or a medical single. I was prepped for the single but then they it's like...now they thought I wanted a roommate (which I did) but to be on my floor but I had thought I couldn't do that according to them, to have specific request to be on that floor with a roommate. I love Sammy but I had just mentally prepared myself to have a medical single and now...I don't know. I have no freaking idea what is going on and neither do they and it's like...BLARGH! As long as I can be on my floor. I mean a single would be nice but I love Sammy but her future roommate just got approved for a medical single and I AM CONFUSED!!!

Fuck man.

I just want to know where the hell I am living and not confuse Sammy anymore too. Gah.

Okay I am breathing. I just get frustrated sometimes.
It has been a looooong semester and it still feels like a long way to go yet even though it is only about three weeks left here.

Gah. I just need to be a better communicator. I try but translation doesn't always go too well.
I like to kind of have a game plan.
I am also realizing that I am a lot easier to go poofy than I thought. I tend to live my emotions in extremes. There isn't much room for grey when they hit me.
The application of my black and white graphical obsession may be from this. On the surface I tend to live in the shades of the extremes. The grey....I'm learning that, learning if I can feel it, what grey means, how to express it. I have finally at the age of 20 felt the ranges of emotions and actually recognize what they mean but now is the process of application and sorting where I can factor in if it is pure emotion, purely logic or where the two can possibly concede or work together. It is complicated but...
I feel secure enough in myself now that I trust these things to work out. I feel like this academic year for me has been sorting out my own identity but my identity as an adult and accepting the challenges I am going to face. I may not know what lies ahead but I know the challenges I may face now. I have finally completely accepted my physical identity and my mental. I think I know myself as well as I can at this point and I accept myself. So that makes me feel okay even if I will drive my own brain to nuts and back.

But now I need to get to Spanish class.
Eeeep!
Bye.
Peace.
~Lo