I should be doing homework but it has been a fabulous day.

Self-defense was awesome tonight. We did this technique where someone bear hugs you from behind and you slide your foot down the front of their shin (scrapping their skin off with the edge of your shoe, figuratively in practice) and then you kind of brace your hips against theirs as you grab their ankle and lift it straight up, putting them flat on their ass. You can leave them there or 1) break their knee 2) kick them in the groin 3) other nastiness that you prefer. I found it fun. I liked the woosh feeling of my partner going down behind me and my instructor said I executed it perfectly.
Hellz yeah!
We did a few other techniques that were fun as well, such as breaking a front two hand choke and then just a front two-hand shirt grab.
I did get accidentally though lightly elbowed in my cheek but it was fine. The girl apologized immensely but I was perfectly fine. Jake, my instructor, and I were just like "Nooo! Stop! It's okay!" Jake "You don't apologize in this class. It's self defense and accidents will happen. Her face is fine." Me "Yup, I come here expecting the pain." It was a funny dialogue for me having to explain how once again pain is part of the learning equation. Because of it, especially in my arms, I have a much greater understanding of how my body works.
To some level the class has been up-ed in difficulty. Evie, who has been with Kevin and Jake as long as I have, is being pushed a little bit more. I have striven to get better at the class. With Paul being in class I feel as though I honestly have a new level to strive for. He was there to be positive and to be a peer inspiration at the same time. Kevin and Jake are starting to ask a little bit more of Evie now as well. At the second year she is ready to do a front fall from standing up (I probably was last semester but it took some mental work). The same is being asked of the rest of the class but there is a pointed focus. Evie does annoy me a bit when she is goofing around and should be paying attention to techniques and respecting the instructors more. I can feel the irritation from Jake sometimes and it gets on my nerves. She gets a lot of liberties but there are points when just...ugh.
Anyhoo, it was still a good class. We started doing the kata form again and despite my dislike of it I am starting to understand it, feel the moves. I'd rather real hand-to-hand but I am coming to respect the form more.

So...non-martial arts stuff. :-P

I went Israeli dancing with my friend Stacey this weekend. It was a fun time! We went to a Jewish Community Center to do it. Having never danced the steps before I made an effort. Israeli dance is a lot of foot work which I am terrible at but I tried. There are a lot of the same steps in all the dances just different combos and speeds each time. It is really neat how every song has its dance. The dancing isn't about the individual but the community, everyone being in sync and harmony, part of the collective dance. There is no age limit to any dance so long as the people can keep up.
I really liked it, how I was able to understand culture from just seeing them dance and what the dances mean overall without going into individual differences. It was pretty awesome.

Academically things are heating up. I am trying to juggle time and homework and repel the tired feeling but at the end of the day my bed is a welcome retreat. This week I need to really burn the academic rubber. We have 19 academic days left...Ugh.
I am now registered for classes for my senior year (freaking crazy right?) and thinking about all the end traditions we have to do.

Speaking of seniors...my partner. Things have gone really well between us lately. Like...the mush...it is seeping in on me. I'm starting to figure out there is no point in resisting. I forking like him! He's been pretty sweet lately and my heart just goes "AWWWW!" and I mentally just go into girly-smiley-ness. My friends have noticed it too. After a month and a half since our first date I changed my profile picture on Facebook to be of him and I (don't laugh, this is how we do it nowadays, 'kay?...also the only one I have...) and suddenly hear everyone referring to us as boyfriend and girlfriend. I've even tested out the words myself (although they sound so....juvenile).
As of today Matt invited me to stay for senior week and that means I get to meet his family when they come up for graduation. This isn't until the end of May but wow...I was just a tad bit smiley.
I think we've even bordered on honest-to-Bob true romance. Not that we haven't had it but it feels deeper. He surprise hugged me last week after I hadn't seen him for a day or so and it completely made my whole day as he had never done that before.
Then hanging out on Friday night we're laying in my bed and I start singing "Odds, all I really want are Odds. In the morning I want Odds..." a song from my class year and a play off The Beastie Boy's "Girls" song. Matt is Even so he says "Well if you want Odds in the morning that won't be me." So I turn to him and sing "Evens, all I really want are Evens...." and then specify more "Matt, all I really want is Matt..." while he is grinning. "There are a lot of Matts on campus" he says. Me: "Okay then. 'Matt Edumund Peter, all I really want is Matt Edmund Peter....' How many of those are there on campus?" He puts his arm around my head, pulls my face close to his and has the most beautiful expression in his eyes. "Uno," he says semi-silly and I smiled back at him even bigger. It was just one of those golden moments where I could feel what can only be called his love. It was beautiful and intimate and I'm burying it in my personal museum of happiness forever.
I am enjoying myself a lot. I haven't said the "four letter word" but I want it to be right. Sometimes it is at the tip of my tongue but I need to wait, to be sure. I feel like I'm talking about virginity here but I want it to be special, to be right, to make sure he knows I mean it when I say it also know he is ready to hear it without thinking I am jumping the gun. It might sound a little ridiculous but it is important to me as I care about him deeply. The heart is a precious thing.

There have been a few drama llama things happening such as my almost-paramour Jason.
So. Glad. That didn't end up happening. Really.
Basically after me he waited around and then went to play with my friend Stacey but was like "we are not going to date, just fool around" thing that he essentially told me. But she had issues when he was pushing for penis-vagina sex and she was like "Er...I want to save that for someone that loves me and he does not love me obviously." Basically it was a hard limit for her and him pressing it made her really uncomfortable (I just found this out a week ago and it killed me because I felt so bad for her). She was asking for advice so I told her she needed to talk to him about it and remind him at a hormone sober time. Then I ended up confessing him and I had played around....and then wished I had some testicles to punch myself in. I admitted it as a friend trying to reach out but then realized how stupid it was. She felt second best to me and it was intensified because I am dating a person whom she long had a crush on. Me: -FACEPALM- Stacey understood that I was reaching out as a friend though and we are cool now. It was shitty.
But the shit goes on! This Saturday I see her and ask her how the conversation with Jason went. She looks like death. Why? HE FORKING WAS MOVING ON FROM HER! HE WAS GOING ON A DATE WITH ANOTHER MOTHER HIEFERING WOMAN THAT NIGHT!
Yeah. Fuck you Jason. With a fork.
Anyhoo, I know this woman he is going on the date with and am completely vexed by it because I couldn't see her an Jason together at all. Second apparently he is really into this new woman and can see like....a future together and stuff? Yeah...like what the fuck?
Stacey and I vented about this on Sunday night as we headed up to Israeli dancing and just like...essentially why is he a bit asinine. He went into the friends with benefits all logic brained with Stacey and I and then threw that out the window in like....a day. It was bullshit. Yes, Stacey is graduating but sometimes you take a risk like that and see what happens. Jason made her feel completely inadequate and like she wasn't worth it. That FREAKING BLOWS! And all the same Stacey and I both want to remain friends with him because he is comfortable and a good friend...but that serves challenging when things like this happen. Our friends that know what is going on have no idea what to feel or think.
Personally I think Jason has big character flaws and that I will never become involved with him again. Stacey called him a cheater and I'd agree. He is a comfortable, cheater, friend and it blows.
Shit is confusing, yo.

But now I need to sleep. EEEK! Homework all day tomorrow!
Buenos noches. Yes, this has been long, a lot has and will continue to happen.
Peace.
~Lo