Hello Journal Scape,
It's been a while and a lot has been happening in the past month.

What exactly?
I lived with my friend Lala for a week and a half while I was in training and mastered her city's public transportation system, falling in love in time to moved back to my home town...
...and into my own apartment. I spent a few days at my parent's before signing a lease on a place. So currently I am living on my own.

It seems so short in those few sentences but this month feels as though ages have passed, and in some sense they have. I feel bad for not marking it, but I am now working on my 9th year with JournalScape with this entry. I have been terribly negligent but also terribly busy.

Today has been my first real day where I have felt like I have really been able to "settle" between working full time last week and having Matt at my place this past weekend. Mom visited and took me to do my laundry and grab Mexican (I had Huevos con Chorizo and six hours later I'm still full). She misses me and is pretty scared about me, her little girl, living on my own. But I'll make it. Somehow.
Matt and I stopped in at "home" a few times this weekend and the dogs went pretty crazy to see us. Bizzy practically turned herself inside out to see both of us: "LOOOEEEYYY! OH YOU BROUGHT MATT TOO!!!" Angus and Auggie were spastic as ever, both being very people oriented dogs. What surprised me was Konnor's joy. I refer to him as the Cranky Old Man most days but he was so happy to see me that he didn't care about Auggie or Angus for once. The pack was quite caught up in being reunited with me. It's always the hard part of leaving home- I miss my dogs and I think they equally miss me.

But in spite of the hard times, I think my family "pack" is doing okay. It's good to realize that there is a fragile peace for everyone right now, always a miracle in a family as big as mine.

Bllllarrrgh....must keep focused...
So, I am done with my training and am officially on the teller at my branch for the predictable future. I am under my "90 days" which is basically the trial period wherein I am supervised and still learning.
However, my bank is in a state of CRAZY right now! We are converting to a new core system that goes live November 1st. I have not started to learn the new one yet because I am still getting the hang of the old one which they will be using until October 31st. Everyone else in the mean time is going to training for the new core operating system and kind of scaring me how wacked out the new system can be...I hope hope hope I can adapt.
The good thing is that for the most part I am understanding Check 21, the new digital proofing check system we started using last week, provided that things run smoothly. Sometimes I have hiccups but for the most part I am understanding the checks thing.

The challenge of a teller job is that you have to be both customer service and a data entrant. As I relax into my duties the customer service is coming but it can be nerve wracking- I'm handling people's money here. I need to improve my counting skills since with large quantities of cash I have a hard time keeping track. You would be amazed at how easy you do get used to handling the money though. I'm sure it will be easier with time and I am ABSORBING it, it just takes time.

Once I am done with my current batch of books I plan on borrowing some intro to economics books so I can have a better perspective of how the economy works in general as well as how banks work in to the equation. I thought about taking an econ class in college but by the time my senior year came around I wanted an easier year and the courses didn't fit into my schedule.

So, speaking of books, my library longing has been taken care of. I walk to the library nearly everyday (well partially because I didn't have internet access in my place until today) and have about five books out right now, most of them non-fiction. I am reading Mary Roach's "Stiff" and it is amazing. I can barely put it down!
I seem to have a medical fixation as far as reading goes, since this is the third or fourth I have borrowed in the genre. I read "Putting Makeup on Dead People", a YA read about a normal girl who wants to go to mortuary school, "White Coat Black Hat" about the pharamceutical industry as a business and now "Stiff." It's making me want to dive back into my anatomy books. Physiology is quite interesting as is the medical world as a business.

Man, I can become interested in anything. But I think I am transitioning between fixations right now. For the past year or two my primary fixation has been BDSM/kink (yes family members who didn't know, I just TMIed the fuck out of you) and now that it's just part of who I am instead of a brand new discovery, I am getting back to other interests. I think it's that I'm also free of academia, so instead of attacking multiple classes I can just cruise on a few select interests instead, similar to what I did when home schooling. It's a nice feeling.

Relationship update...hm...um...I love Matt but we are both in a strange place right now.
I'm getting impatient and things haven't exactly flowed to "plan"...because whoa shit wow, Matt still hadn't had a job until just AFTER I graduated and then since he is technically temp and I'm not particularly fond of his landlord I wasn't gun ho for Buffalo. I'm too independent to be content being there job hunting and then I got a damn nice part time one here in my home town first. But that's what happens in life. The tables turn.
I'm having a bit of angst too because shit did he get it made going out to Buffalo. Pays nothing in rent, full time job, fully equipped apartment, nothing to do to his car but gas and upkeep. I was glad for him but now that I am doing it on my own my brain has started regularly shouting "SUCK MY NUT!". And then he has the BALLS to critique my place in little ways when he is here? No. Fuck no. Yes, lets pause for a moment and think about the realities of rent, gas, electric, internet, and food and being completely responsible for yourself. It's scary. I've been feeling it. But it feels good to be doing it. Add that to Matt's brain and then add car payment and insurance that he hasn't had to pay and loans and OH MY GOD! LIFE IS SCARY!
Well yes, mother heifer, it is. Grrr! ANGST ANGST ANGST!

Fuck money! Yes! I said it! Take your dollar bills and your pocket change and GET NASTY WITH IT! UH! YEAH! (But you might want to sterilize it first, fyi.)
No, but now I mean "fuck money" in the angry way in which I intentionally wrote that before becoming ridiculous.

But also, do something sadistic and evil to people who could be interesting but are unfortunately boring as hell...because we know they can use the excitement.

...Alright. I love him. I love him. I'm just having one of those moments when I totally don't. It's healthy, right?
m
But I am glad for this coming weekend as I'm pretty sure I'm headed back to my college for an impromptu alumnae meeting. I've been quite ignorant of Wells happenings in the past month so suddenly it's like "Wait? Odd/Even happened? Evens won? Someone got tackled at the game? It's nearly October? HOLY BOB!" I will be glad to see my classmates though, as well as my nestlings in flight (me=suddenly realizing how many people I have "adopted" from Wells). Should be a good time! :-)

Anyhoo...I really should go make dinner...you know...at 9:30 at night. I can sleep in tomorrow. It's cool.

Peace!
~Lo