I had something else planned for today's entry but I am having problems with the files I was going to use. So we get one of those list quizzes instead:

1. Are you an innie or an outie?
My bellybutton is a little strange. But basically it is an innie

2. Have you ever worn bell-bottoms?
Every kid who grew up in the 70s did.

3. Have you ever written a song?
I've done a couple of parodies but nothing original

4. Can you make change for a dollar right now?
Yes.

5. Have you ever been in the opposite sex's public toilet?
Yes.

6. Have you ever smelled your own feet?
I'm not sure. Probably when I was young.

7. Do you like ketchup on or beside your french fries?
Beside

8. Can you touch your tongue to your nose?
No.

9. Have you ever been a boy/girl scout?
I was a cub scout for a year. I did not like it.

10. Have you ever broken a mirror?
Yes.

11. Have you ever put your tongue on a frozen pole?
No but I remember one winter my brother made me touch my tongue to the frozen door knob to our house. Then he swung the door open really fast. Asshole.

12. What is your biggest pet peeve?
Goose poop.

13. Do you slurp your drink after it's gone?
Most times.

14. Have you ever blown bubbles in your milk?
Yes. When I was a kid.

15. Would you rather eat a Big Mac or a Whopper?
Big mac

16. Have you ever gone skinny-dipping?
No. But I've wanted to.

17. When you are at the grocery store, do you ask for paper or plastic?

Plastic is easier to carry

18. True or False: You would rather eat steak than pizza.
True


19. Did you have a baby blanket?
I'm not sure.

20. Have you ever tried to cut your own hair?
Yes.

21. Have you ever sleepwalked?
Yes. When I was very sick when I was a child.

22. Have you ever had a birthday party at McDonalds?

No.

23. Can you flip your eye-lids up?
Yes.

24. Are you double jointed?
No.

25. If you could be any age, what age would you be?
33 was a very good year.

26. Have you ever gotten gum stuck in your hair?
No.

27. Have you ever thrown-up after a roller coaster ride?
No.

28. What is your dream car?
It used to be the Acura but I'm not sure any more.

29. What is your favorite cartoon of all time?
The Powerpuff Girls

30. Would you go swimming in shallow waters where, one year earlier, a shark had attacked a child?
Yes.

31. If you were in a car sinking in a lake, what would you do first?
God what a stupid question. What would anyone do? They'd get the hell out of the car.

32. Have you ever ridden in an ambulance?
Yes. When I was twelve I was in a car accident when my sister 2 of 12 decided to take a bunch of us for a drive the day after she got her license. A couple of my brothers starting fighting in the back seat and when my sister turned to yell at them she drove the car into the side of a bridge. This was pre mandatory seat belt laws and I was sitting in the front seat, so my head hit the windshield. I have a two inch scar on the back of my head and I broke my collar bone.

33. Can you pick something up with your toes?
Yes.

34. How many remote controls do you have in your house?
No.

35. Have you ever fallen asleep in school?
Not that I can recall but it wouldn't surprise me.

36. How many times have you flown in an airplane in the last year?
None.

37. How many foreign countries have you visited?
Only Canada. Hopefully that changes someday.

38. If you were out of shape, would you compete in a triathlon if you were somehow guaranteed to win a big, gaudy medal?
This question makes no sense. I'm out of shape but I win a triathlon? Is the medal for most pathetic performance?

39. Would you rather be rich and unhappy, or poor and happy?
Poor and happy.

40. If you fell into quicksand, would you try to swim or try to float?
Doesn't swimming require floating? God, why I am filling this thing out?

41. Do you ask for directions when you are lost?
If I'm in a rush. Sometimes I deliberately get lost.

42. Have you ever had a Mexican jumping bean?
No.

43. Are you more like Cinderella or Alice in Wonderland?
I'm more like the chesire cat.

44. Would you rather have an ant farm with no ants or a box of crayons with broken points?
The crayons

45. Do you prefer light or dark bread?
The only dark breads I can think of are pumperknickle and banana bread type stuff. I like them all. Depends on the sandwich.

46. Do you prefer scrambled or fried eggs?
Scrambled.

47. Have you ever been in a car that ran out of gas?
Yes. My mother had a car that had no gas guage. Instead of filling it up to the top every few days or so like a rational person, she would put five dollars worth of gas in it every so often. This gave her no way of figuring out how much she was using, so eventually she ran out.

48. Do you talk in your sleep?
On rare occasions I have been told that I do.

49. Would you rather shovel snow or mow the lawn?
This is why I rent.

50. Would you rather be bitten by a poisonous snake or constricted by a python?
I'd rather be bitten by a snake. It would be a faster way to go I'm guessing.

51. Have you ever played in the rain?
Mud football was a neighborhood tradition.

52. Which do you think is more dangerous: an angry bear or a hungry white shark?
An angry bear.

53. Would you climb a very high tree to save a kitten?
I don't need a kitten as an excuse to climb a high tree.

54. Can you tell the difference between a crocodile and an alligator?
Yes.

55. Do you drink pepsi or coke?
Coke

56. What's your favorite number?
The square root of negative one. Read 'We' by Zevgeny Zamiatin.

57. If you were a car, would you be an SUV or a sports car?
Neither. I'm not quite SUV sized, but I'm definitely not a sports car. I'm more like a like a low price mid sized car with a V-6 that has a broken parking brake. And much as I prefer standard shift, I'm probably more of an automatic, with a rarely used overdrive gear.

58. Have you ever accidentally taken something from a hotel?
No.

59. Would you blow your nose at the dinner table?
No. I aim it into a napkin.

60. Have you ever slipped in the bathtub?
Yes.

61. Do you use regular or deodorant soap?
deodorant.

62. Have you ever locked yourself out of the house?
My house is not locked. Or rather my lock is twenty miles of atmosphere separating me from the nearest metropolitan area. We are far enough from any other houses that no one would notice an intruder breaking a window so it is kind of pointless. And anyone coming on to the property is risking getting licked to death by the puppy.

63. Would you rather make your living as a singing cowboy or as one of the Simpsons voices?
I'd go with the cowboy.

64. If you could invite any movie star to your home for dinner, who would it be?
Qwyneth Paltrow. And afterwords I would show her my science fiction collection. Which she would find so impressive that she would instantly hop in the sack with me.


65. Have you ever gotten a truck driver to honk his horn?
No.

66. Which would you rather live with: a huge nose or crossed eyes?
A huge nose.

67. Would you hang out with someone your best friend didn't like?
Yes.

68. Would you hang out with someone your best friend liked, but you didn't like?
This thing must have been written a thirteen year old girl with acne.

69. Have you ever returned a gift?
Yes.

70. Would you give someone else a gift that had been given to you?
Nah.

71. If you could attend an Olympic Event, what would it be?
Diving or gymnastics.

72. How many pairs of shoes do you own?
Four. It's the work thing. Used to be I'd go through sneakers much faster than shoes. Now I'm a grown up and it works in reverse.

73. If your grandmother gave you a gift that you already have, would you tell her?
That would require a Oujia board.

74. Do you sing in the car?
All the time.

75. Would you rather jump into a dumpster or into a vat of honey?
Dumpster.

76. What is your favorite breed of dog?
Springer spaniel.

77. Would you donate money to feed starving animals in the winter?
No. But if someone offered to put them out of their misery, I'd pay them for the meat.

78. If you were a bicycle, would you be a stingray or a mountain bike?
Mountain bike.

79. What is your least favorite fruit?
Peach

80. What kind of fruit have you never had?
Apple.

81. If you won a $5,000 shopping spree to any store, which store would you pick?
McDonald's

82. What brand sports apparel do you wear the most?
thirteen year old girl with acne from an upper middle class or higher family

83. Are/were you a good student?
Well. I did steal an exam in college. So I guess that makes me bad.

84. Among your friends, who could you arm wrestle and beat?
Probably all of them. Except Kathy.

85. If you had to choose, what branch of the military would you be in?
Air Force.

86. Would you ever parachute out of a plane?
I'm planning on it. I have to bungie jump too.

87. What do you think is your best feature?
My devotion to my daughter. (Say "Awwwww. Ain't that sweet?")

88. If you were to win a grammy, what kind of music would it be for?
Graham cracker music

89. What is your favorite season?
Autumn. It is the only season that rates two names.

90. How many members do you have in your immediate family?
Eleven sisters and brothers plus me, 2 parents, one child = 15.

91. Which of the five senses is most important to you?
Touch. Which is actually more five or six senses in itself.

92. Would you be a more successful painter or singer?
Singer.

93. How many years will/did you end up going to college?
Seven. Plus a few odd courses I've taken for fun.

94. Have you ever had surgery?
A few times.

95. Would you rather be a professional figure skater or professional football player?
Some of them women skaters are pretty nice, but on the other hand football players seem not to have problems with the ladies, on the other hand they do have a lot of injuries, but they get paid quite a bit more. So I don't know.

96. What do you like to collect?
Books. Computer games. I'm a geek.

Ninety six questions. What the hell? Must be the person I stole this from got tired and didn't want to answer the last four. I'll make them up.

97. If your house were on fire and you had pick whether to wear the red shoes or the green ones before you jumped out the window which would you pick?
The green ones.

98. Who would you rather be stuck on a desert island with Barney the purple dinosaur, The Tellitubbies or The Stay Puff Marshmellow Man?
Barney. Barney is freckin cool.

99. What is your bra size and/or penis length.
First, in my case it's "and" not "or". Second what kind of a pervert wrote this question?

100. Now that you have answered one hundred questions how do you feel?
Like someone with way too much idle time on their hands.