The good news is there have been just a few ridiculous temper tantrums and fights with her brother--few but most draining to cope with.

The bad news is she's having a tough time transitioning to fourth grade. She (and I) have trouble with transitions anyway; she has a new teacher after having the same one for three years; the social dynamics are different; the academic expectations have increased; and we added a second day of religious education, with Hebrew class now being separate from general history, culture, and values. It's a lot.

We're seeing it physically: she's having trouble sleeping, the first week her whole body ached, this week her stomach hurts. We're seeing it emotionally: Thursday, she complained about the burdens of school. Friday she wouldn't talk about what went wrong. We suspect she did something she's ashamed of, perhaps being rude to another student. She was so upset she chose not to go out to ice cream with the gang.

Today seems better. She slept well last night. She played well with David, albeit briefly. And now, she's cleaning out her room, a task that makes her feel organized and calm.

I'm hugging her a lot. I'm trying not to offer a lot of solutions but to just listen and commiserate. I'm going to discuss it with her teacher soon even though Rose would prefer I didn't.

I told Rose about my horrible transition to fourth grade. Second and third grades had been a complete wasteland academically, so I was not ready for Mrs. Hills and her rigorous requirements. I freaked out. I threw lots of temper tantrums about homework, and my parents had to resort to a sticker chart. I still remember those gold stars. I'm sure my mother still remembers the fits.

I don't think there is anything wrong with being challenged academically and having to struggle through changing friendships. It's just hard work.