This just in from my prestigious LA bureau (...my former room where Cronkette now resides): For anyone in SoCal watching the 11 p.m. news tonight (Monday), you might see a report about an investigation into a near miss on the runway at LAX yesterday.

(BTW...while we're on the topic, remember: As George Carlin points out, it's a near hit! God we're dumb.)

Cronkette was on that flight. She called me last night, a little shaken up after they landed, and told me the plane came within about 10 yards of landing and then suddenly accelerated and climbed again. When they finally landed she & friends tried to get some answers at Continental.

At first, the guy behind the desk thought they were nuts. Cronkette said she saw his demeanor change while talking on the phone. After hanging up, he was evasive.

All I have to say is...That was close.

Well, on second thought I guess I would add to that, "Dear LAX: Please, if at all possible, I would appreciate it very much if you could, in the future, take all available measures to do your very best and try not to kill my girlfriend, you dumb motherfuckers!!"

[cleared throat, ahem]

But thank God she and several of my friends are alright.

I wish I could catch the news - I don't see any articles on LA Times or CNN yet, but I'll keep an eye out & update. Jesus Christ, if that were me I'd be so unnerved - I'd go get drunker than Michael Phelps.