I know, I know.


You don't want to hear it.


It's getting old fast.


...But still, I must insist - as Supreme Dictator.


...


...


...FARTKNOCKERS!

It's cold!


It's seriously freezing here. Walking to the car, my head hurt so bad I couldn't think. I keep waiting for George Bush to approach and tell me how appretiary he is to me and my fellow Canadians for letting the planes land in Halifax on 9/11.

Worse, the gods have blanketed the land with more of that mysterious white powder - like a frozen cocaine. (Only not, I checked.) And it turns out you actually have to scrape it off your car before you can drive in the morning. I used my roommate Hugh's spatula. He was appreciative.

Oh, and allow me a quick personal sidebar: Cronkette, I saw a Cabrio blanketed in sno- uh, "mysterious white powder" on the road today. It was drivin' along just fine. Your car would survive here. The moral of the story, as always, is that I'm right.


...Because I am the man.


[tumbleweed]


(Whew, I'm gonna pay for that one! But it was worth it - probably.)

And now, on to grim matters of business: Ty Willingham. As an ND coach, we hardly knew ye. It's unecessary for me to echo the cries of protest already out on the wires - except for one. By doing this, ND loses a little of that credibility that makes it special.

A lot of credibility.

I can't believe AD Kevin White didn't anticipate the national backlash, or that he didn't care and did it anyways. (I can't decide which is worse.) For me, the craziest part was when White lauded Ty for his work developing players as scholars and individuals from Sunday through Friday, but then took issue with their performance on Saturdays.

If there's a better example of have cake + eat too, I've yet to see it.

Seriously, does White think schools like Florida State have an aversion to making their star athletes be academic scholars too? Anyone exposed to higher education knows there's only so many hours in the school week. Time devoted to studies chips away at football excellence and vice-versa.

That's fundamentally what I always liked about ND, somehow they managed to transcend that principle (at least, to an extent more than most schools) and still produce a caliber football program. But they had a standard, and they didn't compromise.

Until now.

And if I'm feeling particularly ballsy, I'll take a look at the race card. Look, I don't think race had anything to do with Notre Dame firing Willingham. That's just Notre Dame being stupid. But the fact that out of over a hundred division-one coaches only two are black is deplorable. Those odds, plotted against the percentage of black players coming out of college, point to an undeniable glass ceiling at work.

You'd think I'm not breaking any shattering news here, but according to an ESPN poll today of 87,000 people, 33% answered that diversity in college programs is "Fine -- The numbers aren't there, but schools are doing everything right in looking at qualified candidates."

"Schools are doing everything right"?? Jesus!

I'm not shocked because I disagree (even if do.) I'm shocked at how people can just assume that. I mean, how could anyone ever say that for sure - with so much confidence. Everyone is doing everything right. No problem!

And how exactly do you crunch the numbers to land at that conclusion?

*sigh*

Let's all drink the Kool Aid, I guess.