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2004-12-13 3:16 PM Barefoot & pregnant in the kitchen Mood: smelly Read/Post Comments (5) |
Think back on that "Every sperm is sacred" musical number in Monty Python's "The Meaning of Life" - where the mom's doing the dishes in the kitchen and gives birth (plop!) - and you'll get a pretty accurate picture of my overwhelming domesticity today.
In the morning Dickie Sr. and I visited a meat market in the hood for 20 lbs of sausage, and then swung by a giant smelly warehouse just east of downtown for about 50 lbs of shrimp and crab. We've got four massive cauldrons of da holiday file gum-BOH on the stove right now. I'm taking my first real baby steps to learning the family recipe. Turns out the first "baby steps" involve peeling 20 lbs of shrimp for over 2 hours. Again, Cronkette is gonna be thrilled when she gets home. ("Christ, what's that smell??") Yikes, Cronkette! I just forgot - I have to cook dinner when I get home. If I don't have a hot plate on the table waiting for her, I'm in biiig trouble. I could find myself out on the curb by nightfall. Quick: Anyone know a quick & easy recipe for lasagna? And finally, some pressing questions - mainly directed at Frosty, who currently finds himself in Minneapolis. Where it's 15 degrees before wind chill: [ahem] 1. What SPF-level sunblock do you think is appropriate for my morning sunbathing session tomorrow? 2. In your expert opinion, should I use cold-water wax for my basecoat? Or just use standard basecoat and then put the cold-water on top? 3. The surf's pretty big...so I guess I should go with my shortboard, right? You're right, I should go with my shortboard. Ten oughta do it, don't you think? You think we need one more? You think we need one more. Alright, we'll get one more. 4. When Cronkette and I crash the parents' place and use the outdoor jacuzzi, should we make it a middle-of-the-week thing, or should we save that for Friday night? 5. Should we go with Coronas by the jacuzzi, or Tecates? Or how 'bout Dos-equis? (Remember, Frosty: all three are lime-friendly.) 6. Should I go with my board shorts, or be more daring and sport a taut pair of speedos? OK, maybe I'm being a little cruel (especially with that last image). But hey, come January 4th you can all throw this right back in my face. Read/Post Comments (5) Previous Entry :: Next Entry Back to Top |
:: HOME :: GET EMAIL UPDATES :: The Desert Sun :: J-school :: Undergrad :: Hoya Saxa :: The Other Dark Continent :: Greatest Sports Franchise Ever :: Bill Simmons - Sports Guy Home Page :: Laker Jim's Kurt Rambis Page :: Dodger Blues Dot Com :: This American Life :: Slate :: NOVICA.com :: Racist Big East Semi Final Loser :: Karen Warrior-Chieftain :: Sara Global :: Kirty Word :: Award-winning Pointlessness :: The Ultimate Douchebag :: RM :: Miss E's Opinions :: Dad's book :: |
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