Teachers told us
The Romans built this place
They built a wall and a temple
And an edge-of-the-empire garrison town
They lived and they died
They prayed to their gods
But the stone gods did not make a sound
And the empire crumbled
Till all that was left
Was a stone some workman found

--Sting



So last night after class I trudged five blocks east to the Chicago Symphony Center through the oppressive onslaught of horrific white fluffy stuff to meet my aunt, who generously invited me to an evening performance of Japanese Kodo drumming.

Some of the sickest, baddest, coolest shit I have ever seen involving a mallet and animal hide. And I've seen it all. Hopefully I got PETA's attention with that one.

These guys (and two girls) are nuts - some of the wackiest upper body strength you'll ever see...and this is coming from a former rower. Through ensemble drumming, these artists create mesmerizing rhythmic patterns. But the task is physically grueling - at times painful to watch - and requires a spiritual endurance to transcend the physical agony. Through this meditative process, the performers achieve ecstasy. Or something like that, apparently.

This morning, I get back into the newsroom for the first time, after getting back on my feet this weekend, after being mercilessly struck down by the Chicago Plague, only to learn that I need to have all my reporting and feature quotas done by a week from tomorrow. From tomorrow.

"As in, like, 'tomorrow'?"

To-fucking-morrow.

[cue heart attack]

Last quarter, about this time, I emulated the poor lone Water Tower schmuck who stayed behind to fight the great Chicago fire, despite impossible odds. He wound up hanging himself rather than letting the flames get him first. But he fought the good fight, dammit.

This quarter? I am the Kodo drummer. That's right - that's me, up there on the stage, wearing nothing but a headband and those little Japanese wrap-around tighty-whiteys, illuminated by candlelight, beating the living shit out of a massive drum hovering above my head for 20 minutes straight, sweating bullets and spasmically screaming out the will to hang on - and bang on.

Thank you sir, may I have another!

I am the Kodo drummer.

BOOM-BOOM-BA-BOOM-BOOM-BA-BOOM BOOM

Today I filed, got headway done on feature number three, and scheduled final feature number four.

Meanwhile for some reason, SportsCenter plays on the TV above me, which normally would be a blessing. Today, however, I get to watch the Lakers/Knicks OT debacle over and over again, you know - where Kobe fumbles the pass from Luke Walton. Thus far I've died inside at least 14 times today.

But I shoulder on.

I am the Kodo drummer.

BOOM-BOOM-BA-BOOM-BOOM-BA-BOOM BOOM

"JAI!!"