Dickie Cronkite

So I just got back from a press conference at the Capitol Building.

I can report, to my loyal readers, with due authority, that Orrin Hatch is a lot taller than you'd expect in person. Before it started, he was hanging out just a couple feet away from me and my co-worker Ed, who later remarked on the metro that he really wanted to kiss the Senator.

[awkward silence]

"I couldn't help it," Ed reminisced. "The guy just had so much charisma!"

[awkward silence]

"I could almost tell what shampoo he was using."

[furhter silence]

I never thought I'd be questioning a man's sexuality based on his fierce attraction to Orrin Hatch. Truth is clearly stranger than fiction.

Also, Dick Lugar is much shorter in person...and Lamar Alexander is about as nerdy as he comes across on TV. These are the details you don't get in mainstream media. I should start charging a subscription fee.

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2005-04-04 2:49 PM Orrin Hatch-inspired gayness Previous Entry :: Next Entry Read/Post Comments (42) Share on Facebook	So I just got back from a press conference at the Capitol Building. I can report, to my loyal readers, with due authority, that Orrin Hatch is a lot taller than you'd expect in person. Before it started, he was hanging out just a couple feet away from me and my co-worker Ed, who later remarked on the metro that he really wanted to kiss the Senator. [awkward silence] "I couldn't help it," Ed reminisced. "The guy just had so much charisma!" [awkward silence] "I could almost tell what shampoo he was using." [furhter silence] I never thought I'd be questioning a man's sexuality based on his fierce attraction to Orrin Hatch. Truth is clearly stranger than fiction. Also, Dick Lugar is much shorter in person...and Lamar Alexander is about as nerdy as he comes across on TV. These are the details you don't get in mainstream media. I should start charging a subscription fee. Read/Post Comments (42) Previous Entry :: Next Entry Back to Top
:: HOME :: GET EMAIL UPDATES :: The Desert Sun :: J-school :: Undergrad :: Hoya Saxa :: The Other Dark Continent :: Greatest Sports Franchise Ever :: Bill Simmons - Sports Guy Home Page :: Laker Jim's Kurt Rambis Page :: Dodger Blues Dot Com :: This American Life :: Slate :: NOVICA.com :: Racist Big East Semi Final Loser :: Karen Warrior-Chieftain :: Sara Global :: Kirty Word :: Award-winning Pointlessness :: The Ultimate Douchebag :: RM :: Miss E's Opinions :: Dad's book ::