More from the World of Spam. Collect the whole set to complete a really bad novel.

He continued his search persistently, and an hour later found the dead body of the third robber lying in the square in the center of the city. But the traveling machine was not on his person, and for the first time the boy began to give way to despair. In the distance he heard loud shouts and sound of renewed strife, warning him that the Turks were recovering consciousness and engaging the Tatars with great fierceness.

So much to understand:
1. Why were the Turks unconscious? Chloroform? Ecstasy? Listening to too much Michael Smerconish?
2. Why is the boy in a state of despair? Amstel Light the only choice of beer? Rejected (again) for American Idol? Watching too much Pat Buchanan?
3. Where are the other two robbers? Testifying at the Michael Jackson trial? Defending Tom DeLay?

Stay tuned...