Best ebay comments of the day (all from the same seller’s feedback):

1. “painting states dogs plasying (sic) mahjong, they weren't” No mention of whether they weren’t actually dogs, or if they were playing some other game.

2. “the item was blurry” This was a comment about a reproduction of a painting of a monkey in a red dress wearing a Carman Miranda headpiece. Blurry is what you hope this type of item is.

3. “after 1 month i must still get 2 oil painting...i don't know why. tell me plz.” Is this sort of like “first prize is a week in Philadelphia, second prize is two weeks”?

4. “Receive very very fast in Canada from US good seller. Super, I recomand to all..” Unlike the usual shitty service from those damn US bad sellers.

5. “pessimo venditore, non ho ricevuto la merce, nemmeno dopo sollecitazione da payp” I think this one just called the seller’s mother a socialist-loving risotto-eating whore.