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...nothing here is promised, not one day... Lin-Manuel Miranda


So here's my theory
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I think I'm a golden retriever.

This morning at 5:45 when I went to try that cute move called "getting out of bed when your hip hurts BAD", I felt something go well, um, sort of clunk. Or thud. Nothing bad; I mean it's not like I rocketed out of bed screaming or gasped or nuttin'. I 've been aware of vertebrae that seem to respond to my every move, clunkety clunkety, lately, but this was different. And a few seconds later I thought "hmmm, things seem a little easier". And while I'm not better, I think by george, we may now have figured out that what's been making me CRAZY the past month is my hip, not my spine and it's a development of something I've been aware of for years; I've got shallow hip sockets. I'm personally VERY deep, but my hips are shallow. I was told of this years ago and it was one of those "if you were NORMAL…" conversations; if I were normal, we'd do hip replacements on me. But I'm not. So we won't. Probably. (Yeah and if I were normal, oh, never mind....)

But I've decided that it's hip dysplasia and that I'm part dog. I know that this condition affects lots of dogs (and a few cats); it's a looseness in hip joints and we already know I have that and that there are fractures in the acetabulum (no, there won't be a quiz, honest) and so I've decided it's genetic and one of my ancestors was a Golden Retriever. And I wouldn't suggest arguing with me about this. Or making any obvious bitch jokes, thank you VERY much. It explains the shedding at least.

I still hurt, but can put weight down again. I'm thinking the pain I get is the "something out of socket and back IN" pain and will, once again, call the orthopedist and talk about what to do; my bet? Call off the nasty test I don't want anyway and go see the hip specialist (no, he's cool but he's not really THAT hip, oh STOP that…) who's a guy I've seen before and liked. And I can probably cut back on the oxycodone, though my doc says it's okay for me to take.

And now, back to bed and books. Currently reading a collection of interviews with John Le Carre and STRANGE ANGEL, a biography of John Whiteside Parsons. We are nothing if not eclectic Chez Roscoe.


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