I wonder if mentors actually know they’re mentoring. I don’t mean those programs they have now FOR mentors but back when it wasn’t as common a word to me, I wonder if those people who influenced me had even a clue how much they affected my life.

I went and looked the word up just now – something I always think is such a cheat in writing but I wanted to be clear exactly what a mentor was. Thinking of it as a role model seemed inaccurate; one doesn’t necessarily want to be that person, or even be like that person. And to my surprise, my extremely elderly American Heritage Dictionary informed me that a mentor (from “Odysseus’ “trusted counselor, Mentor”) meant “a wise and trusted counselor or teacher”. Well, how ‘bout that.

One of my mentors is retiring this month; I’m not happy about this because I considered him so much of a peer, in so many ways, that his retirement means, that, well, that I have friends who are old enough to retire.

(To steal the line Tom Paxton used so long ago “nave you noticed you’re spending time with a slightly older crowd lately?”)

Anyway, here’s what one person said in part about the man who had a huge impact on my life and the way I think, on my politics, my understanding of things like justice and political parties, my activism and my college experience.

“I remain wary of those who have mastered bureaucracies. Often they get ahead by stepping on people, compromising principles and sucking up in all the right places. Competence is not always a strong suit for these suits. Some, though, break the mold in masterful ways, remain human and actually serve the people they are charged with serving. Bill Cibes is one such man.

“William J. Cibes Jr., chancellor of the Connecticut State University System, retires Jan. 31 after 12 years at the helm…

“’This is sad news,’ said Franz Douskey, a poet and author who has worked with Cibes on projects for young writers. "Bill Cibes is one of those great, rare humans. He has a sensitivity, and a soul that has not been lost. They might as well rewrite the job description because the university system will not find anyone like Bill.".
…

“Significantly, as a politician, Cibes was a trusted person even to those who strongly opposed his views. When Gov. Lowell Weicker said establishing a state income tax would be like pouring gasoline on a fire, Cibes put forward a detailed plan to establish such a tax. Cibes saw it as a necessity and was open and honest about it.

“Thus, after 10 years as a state representative from New London, he gained support of the conservative Bill O'Neill wing of the Democratic party -- which virulently opposed the tax -- to replace O'Neill as governor. Cibes lost a primary to the progressive Bruce Morrison, but emerged as a person of unquestioned integrity. Weicker, who beat Morrison and Republican John Rowland in 1990, appointed Cibes as his budget director.
“Throughout the years, Cibes has supported little people, people without power or political juice, in quiet ways. I'm not saying he's an easy mark, because he is not. But, I have personally seen him dip into his own pocket -- not the university system's -- to help people and outside programs in need.
“The system will survive because of the good people in it and because of the dynamic leadership Carter will bring to the job. But, Douskey the poet is right: They will never find anyone like Bill Cibes.”
Thank you, Andy Thibault; I found this piece by him in the “Norwich Bulletin”. I’m not sure how often you hear that sort of commentary about a university chancellor.
Bill Cibes rocks. He was one of my best, probably my best teacher. Ever. And I had some fine teachers in my life, great role models in elementary and high school – the ones who, bless them, got me to write – and a couple great ones in grad school. But Bill was the best.

He joined the faculty at Connecticut College in 1969; I got there as a freshman in the fall of 1970. After a stroke of luck which led me to consider government as a major, in four years, with the exception of statistics (which Bill tried for 3 years to get me to take) I think I took every class he taught. Including Con Law. The HARDEST damn undergraduate course ever offered. Period. We didn’t USE casebooks. We read the opinions, verbatim. All of ‘em. Including the dissenting opinions. It started out opaque. It got easier, but it was still a challenge.

He had a BA at University of Kansas (as I recall, he had enough credits to get like FOUR Bachelor degrees). He went straight on for a doctorate from Princeton in Politics. He then came to Conn and taught there until 1990. Bill and his wife Peg started out living in college provided faculty housing, but they moved out from that convenience, as I recall, in part so he could run as a representative to the state legislature from New London

When he ran for governor, I read about it in the New York Times. In an airport. And gasped. It was SO COOL. Weicker, a maverick Republican turned independent, named Cibes as probably his first appointment after winning the race. Bill, the lifelong Democrat, the guy who still believes WAY more in partisan politics than I ever did.

I don’t know why we clicked. He was new to the school, as was I, yeah. Fairly young. He was terrifically approachable but so were most of the faculty at my school. He was professional as hell, don't get me wrong - he wasn't trying to be one of "us" but he didn't seem too impressed by himself. And it seemed pretty clear that he had a pretty huge brain. Somehow, he simply got me thinking. He TAUGHT. He taught well and made me think. I don’t know how or what it was that he did. I really liked college, and had some excellent professors, but Bill stood above them all. I know that his career path was right for him, but I often rue the loss of the teacher that he was. People are often meant to move onward and upward and I wouldn’t’ deny that to Bill Cibes, but I feel sorry for those folks who never got to be around the Government department at Conn when he taught there.

After I graduated in '74, I vaguely kept in touch – going to the couple of reunions, and getting caught up with him a little. Then when he ran for governor, I bugged my mother, a Connecticut democrat, for bumper stickers oh please. And then the Cibes moved near where she lived. When I visited mom, Bill and Peg and I would have lunch. I remember saying once that I was sorry not to have more to show him; that here I was, not using my degree, and not being a star pupil. I wanted him to be proud of me, to see what a success I’d been and I couldn’t’ really. Bill completely pooh-poohed that, saying it hardly mattered, that I seemed happy. And that was it. And I was and am, though I AM sorry I never really put my hard won education (especially that damn MA but that’s another story) to work.

One day in class, someone at our oh-so-sophisticated east coast college was trying to contrast someone sophisticated with someone not so very sophisticated and made the mistake of referring to the latter as “a hick from Kansas.”

My best friend and I, both majors in the department, who’d spent time in Bill’s classes and who’d invited him to dinner more than once in the dorms with Peg and their daughter Julie – tried SO very hard not to bust out laughing. Bill, as I recall, just grinned. If there was ever a non-hick from Kansas, Professor William J Cibes was that guy.

I’m glad I’m not the only one who appreciates him.