One from McCain. One for Huckabee, for chrisake, at 9:20 this morning (Mike Huckabee is the only candidate for positive change in America. Who knew?) One from the county executive (and no, I have no idea what the hell he actually does. We have a mayor and city councel as well.) for I have no idea who since I actually made the mstake of answering THAT one and hung up after “Sims” (bu I just googled and goddamit anyway.)

And FIVE count’ ‘em FIVE for hillary Clinton. The last one from Herlsef.

TO THE CANDIDATES WHO NEVER SEE THIS SHIT. This shit is revolting. Annoying. Rude. Sucks. Doesn’t work. Turns voters off. Does not do a THING for the electoral process.

In about FORTY-FIVE MINUTES, I will be at my precinct caucus. Where I will vote for my choice of candidate. I would rather read ENTRAILS than use automatic calling messages to decide who to vote for. I WILL NEVER FUCKING BE INFLUENCED BY THESE ANNOYING, RUDE, RIDICULOUS POINTLESS – BUT CHEAP – AUTOMATED PHONE CALLS. I don’t CARE if it’s the candidate. Robert Redford. Or whomever they’ve conned. Unsolicited phone calls do not convince the electorate.

And yes, I know that voters in Florida apparently were stunned to go to the p9olls on Super Tuesday to vote only to be told “um, that was last week in Florida”. Some people ARE STUPID. But even STUPID people are unlikely to changed their vote because in the last 2 days, you made more automated nag calls than your opponent. If you think they will “remind” people to go to the caucus, thanks for the vote of confidence in my inability to string two thoughts together. I’m NOT stupid. Most of us aren’t.

Jesus. If I weren’t already for Obama, I might be solely because NOT ONE OF THESE CALLS was from the Obama campaign. Granted, his website got my precinct wrong, and I made four phone calls to be sure I was going to the right place (we have ONE HOUR to get this all done) but I’m getting to the point where, if I’m on the fence in a local race, it might just be the candidate who doesn’t BUG ME with these goddam calls who gets my vote.

I do not like getting up to answer the phone – it’s a hassle. I don’t always have the phone with me. When I do – like yesterday – I’m waiting to hear a) which is the right polling place and b) where our seats are at the theater tonight. NOT to be solicited by “Washington for Hillary”. And I don’t CARE that it’s caucus Saturday. You DON’T CALL PEOPLE at 9:20 am on the weekend. That’s a rule.

I read a newspaper article a while back that talked about these revolting calls saying they were cheap. I have YET to see any proof, any statement anything whatsoever that says that they WORK.

So if sometime later this year, you call me and I “screen” the call. My apologies. I’m not trying to be rude, really I’m not. I want to talk with you. But I will NOT get up for Paul Newman, ex-Governor Locke, or Betty Boop, I don’t KNOW who the hell is going to call us to tell us who to vote for.

Jesus. Is the electorate THAT STUPID? (please say no, even if it is, okay? I can’t take any more of this!) We have a primary where so far, one fourth of the ballots are invalid because you had to CHECK A GODDAM PARTY affiliation and so far, 25% or more did not read the very simple instructions. Not that it matters – it’s not what will decide anything. It’s a waste of taxpayer money because what counts in Washington State is the caucus vote. Apparently.

But to John, Mike, Hillary, Hillary, Hillary, Hillary, and Hillary. Goddamit. SHUT UP and get off my telephone.