On Facebook and elsewhere, friends are expressing bafflement that anyone would give a flying fuck about Supreme Court Justice nominee Elena Kagan. Who she does or doesn't sleep with. Everyone is saying "what does it matter?" and of course I join in that chorus. It's never mattered. Ever. Whatever job any woman has had. Whether she is single or married, gay or straight, what the hell does it matter? Apparently the jackass right-wing is trying to say she's a LesBEEEN because, since the beginning of time (okay, the beginning of the Obama administration they've got nothing else*. they've been afraid of the 21st century, they've been afraid of anything remotely different, strange, "exotic", new. They're afraid of the future and they're a bit of afraid of all of us.

We're the congregation here, we're all "preaching" to the converted, as it werel. Who she sleeps with DOES matter to those who find it against their way of believing, against what they WANT. It's evil to some, scary to others. Of course it doesn't matter. To US. Sorry folks but strong women still scare these people or they would not do this. They FEAR us because our lives, our insistence on being challenges their one and only way of life. They MUST believe, they HAVE TO believe that they are living the One True Way. These are folks who want to ban books with IMAGINATION in them. Strong women, women who choose (in any number of ways.)

Does anyone really not get this? Women are supposed to be submissive, bear children and clean house and do laundry and we are all, repeat, all supposed to find fulfillment in this. Of course that is exhausting, hard, challenging and amazing work. I'm not being facetious here folks. I don't have children, but my best friend does, and I talk to people who've raised kids, I've talked to my own mother about that job. Are you kidding? And speaking as someone who, for years since becoming seriously disabled has learned how tiring and at times wonderful it is to achieve clean, or dinner, or just to get something done in a day is serious work.

But for some reason, stepping away from that scares Conservatives. They have been, are, and apparently always will be frightened by strong women who live "differently". Who also work, who work outside the home, who don't marry, who don't bear children, who have big deal jobs, or small. Who run things. We're all LesBEEENs. There as so many layers here. a) We scare certain people by having certain anatomy. Which leads to b) It's our fault somehow that we have such anatomy because then they look at us and get all lust-filled and can't concentrate so we have to hide c) If we aren't dusting and making babies we are apparently taking their jobs from them and only they are supposed to have those jobs (even if they're girl jobs). And d) we're LesBeeeeens. And i still don't get why lesbians frighten these people so. They quote the Bible of course, but that's not it. Because there's other stuff in that book they don't quite because it doesn't suit them - all about tolerance and love and throwing the first stone as i recall hearing (i've never read the New Testament and never will but it sort of sneaks in.)

if you didn't know all this, you probably would have stopped reading this blog years ago. (And oh you folks out there who read this blog, you amaze me. Thank you. There are lots of hits registered and I know I don't know you. That's really fantastic.) But Hemingway, back to my diatribe here.

To my friends who ask in bafflement "what does it matter?" about Elena Kagan and who she sleeps with, are you truly baffled? Do you not understand the fear and small-mindedness here? They call any woman - every woman - a lesbian because she is strong, she works outside the house (or doesn't but lives in an "unconventional" way), who runs a company, or a day care, or has a doctorate or stands next to the men on the podium, or the dais, or the pulpit, who does not fit, must be wrong because it scares them and they don't like being scared. I scare them. Me. You scare them Getting to the root of that fear is beyond me, but i've lived with it all my days on this planet and so have you. I've lived with harassment, and objectification and being ignored because I'm not attractive enough. I've lived with magazine ads using women in submissive positions to sell shoes and watching Saturday Night Live using a male actor to portray Janet Reno. I've lived through movements run by men while women make coffee and type, and the mockery when the women speak out. I've volunteered for what 15 years? At New Beginnings shelter, which never seems to be able to take a breather from offering refuge and help to women who are beaten by their loving husbands and partners. I've read the news articles about men shooting up schools, offices and places where women gather because they're scared of us. I've been groped by strangers and I've been propositioned while standing on a corner waiting for a bus. I've gone down the street in fear, day and night, because sorry, but, those are the lessons I learned all my life. I'm female therefore I'm a target. I've gotten strange looks when I asked in a new city when the Pride Parade would be held this year. (But you're..."Yes, and?...)

We're all lesbians. Cool.



*Did you see the Sunday Doonesbury?.