For those of you who don't follow me on Twitter, this is what you're missing:

First Announcement:
Attempting to cook my first turkey. Pray for me.

Update 1:
Correction: apparently I am *smoking* a turkey. :P

Update 2:
It's dead, Jim.

Update 3:
So that's where the giblets were. Oops.

Update 4:
Actually, it's not too bad, if you like your turkey to taste like smoke. Me, not so much. :P

Update 5:
Hunter thinks it looks like a dragon.

Update 6:
Made the mistake of looking at the inside of my oven. Wow. I am SO grateful it's self-cleaning.

Update 7:
The recipe says to use the pan drippings for gravy. Since they look like they may be hiding mastodon bones, I'm thinking maybe not.


Summary: not as bad as it could have been, but I'm going to use a different recipe next time.