Sunday, January 2

"For all the things I'm losing
I might as well resign myself to try and make a change." --Counting Crows

Those words are appropriate for the new year, appropriate for new year's resolutions. Whenever I hear those lyrics in the song titled "I wish I was a girl" (from the CD This Desert Life) I think about my own goals. Writing specifically. In my case, the lyrics would be a touch dramatic. I'm not losing a lot. Only lost time brought on by procrastination and avoidance, and the lost opportunities missed by not using time wisely in the first place. Things aren't dire for me. They haven't been for a long time.

One thing about new year's resolutions: I would rather avoid them. They seem to be cursed and destined to fail because millions of people make resolutions at the the beginning of every year, and not too many stick to them past the end of January.

This year feels different. It's a whole new millennium. 2000 seems to contain a huge significance on a global and personal level.

My Storyboard is updated to reflect the new year, the rejections reset to zero, the stories still out in the mail at the end of last year are still out there at the start of this year. Storyboard 1999 has been moved to my 1999 journal archive (see below). Fifteen rejections last year. That's about twice as much as '98. More stories out in the mail, and I was much better at keeping them out in the mail. 1999 was a first for many things.

I'm still not where I want to be, but I have to maximize the my accomplishments. Self-inflicted guilt and self-depreciation will only bring me down and no further progress will be made.

So I am happy with the number of rejections. It means I've been working. I went to my first World Fantasy Convention this year, and I look forward to going to it again this year in Corpus Christi Texas.

This year, 2000, needs to be a productive year. I need new stories out in the mail. I also need to make those deadlines, externally imposed or self-imposed. I need to live by the Work Sandwich--one hour of writing before day-job and one hour after--everyday.

So I hate New Year's resolutions. This year I can't deny myself resolutions because the drive to accomplish my goals have been growing over the last year or two. Time to put the petty resolution indfference aside.

I will write and send out twelve new stories this year. This is ambitious for me since I had only two new stories last year, but I think a story a month is possible. The ambitious and dreamer part of me would like to do a short story a week. That is still a possibility. I'll start out with twelve and only worry about twelve. Any more stories will be extra bonuses.

This should result in more rejections. Perhaps even a sale. It's possible.

Depending on how I do with the day to day writing, a novel in a month dare might be attempted later in the year.

At our last writers' workshop in December, I had signed up on the calender to bring in a story on January 4, the first workshop of 2000. I'll continue the tradition of handing in a story the first Tuesday of every month. That will give me enough time to revise it after critiques and get it out in the mail by month's end.

Alas, I'm already behind. I need to work hard the next few days to get a story done by Tuesday.

That brings about another new year's resolution. I won't go on the Internet until after the writing is done. Internet related stuff should be the last bit of business to my day.

Wish me luck and may this year bring you whatever you wish for and whatever you strive for.

Best Wishes.





Tuesday, January 4

Well, I have a short-short to hand in to the workshop tonight. That's the first workshop of the year. Tonight I'll sign up to bring in a story for the first Tuesday in Feb.

I didn't get the story I wanted to hand in done, so I did a quickie. I have a habit of pulling my punches like this. I feel I can't finish a story I really care for quickly, so I resort to doing one I care less about, and more importantly one that I can justify if I get bad critiques. Sometimes I don't even pull my punches. Sometimes I just don't hand one in when I sign up to bring one.

The important thing still is that I made a deadline.

I can't bring guilt on myself here. These monthly deadlines are being used so I don't do neither of those two things--pull my punches nor a story no-show. This is just the first month. Time to try to write everyday and make next months deadline.

Tomorrow I'm starting my work sandwich. That's one hour of writing before work and one hour after.

No rejections (or sales) for the year 2000 yet. I have a story at Talebones. It's been about three weeks. I've had a story at Asimov's for almost three months. Sometimes Gardner is quick, sometimes he's slow. I did make the Writers' of the Future deadline at the end of December.

Tonight at the workshop, Jerry Oltion will be giving a discussion on writing fast. That should be interesting and fun. My story gets critiqued next week.

More Later.



Thursday, January 6

I'll be housesitting for the Oltions tomorrow. I enjoy their house and Ginger the cat is good company to. I'll probably take the webtv with me and the computer, of course, to write on.

I'm still not writing everyday and stories are sitting on my desk gathering dust.

Jerry gave a great talk on writing fast last Tuesday. Some of the advice and tips and pointers were geared towards novel writing and full time writers (that means no day jobs) but everything could still be applied to short stories and people with 40 hr. a week jobs.

Preperation is very important. That's knowing what I want to say in a novel and knowing what's going to happen in the scenes I'll be writing that day. Again, I could apply this to short stories, which is what I write now. I have done this sort of thing in the past. It's amazing how easy it is to forget the importance of preperation. When I do do preperation before the performance (the writing) I don't usually realize I'm doing it, so the next time I sit down to write and expect to just begin, I just sit there, not write, and wonder why anything isn't coming.

I could apply the rule of preperation to my writing time more often. It may not be successful all the time, but it may help me a lot in the day to day writing.

"Get out of my own way." Yes. I am working at it.





Sunday, January 9

Ah-ha! My first rejection of the year is from Asimov's, a form rejection. I have yet to get a personal rejection from Gardner. Of course, I haven't sent him many stories yet.

Also, I went to Kate Wilhelm's and Damon Knight's place for their workshop yesterday. Kate was sick, so she didn't participate and was scarcely seen in her own home. She didn't want to pass the bug. I hope she gets better soon. Leslie What, who usually makes it to the workshop, was sick as well. All sick writers get well!

We critiqued three stories (none of them mine) and went out to dinner at the usual Chinese restaurant. I love lemon chicken.

Bruce Holland Rogers was at Kate and Damons. He gave back my story "Messages" and said some good things. He thought it was a fine story and he didn't think I had to change it. He wondered why I was sending to fantasy markets when the story would work fine for literary magazines. He reccomended Rosebud. They pay and I guess a sale there has some prestige.

I can understand his reasoning for sending to literary markets. The fantasy element in this story is very slight. I was just aiming for the bigger markets in fantasy first, you know, just working my way down the food chain. I should count the number of rejections this story has had so far. It's a lot and I still have hope for this one.

It was good to hear that Bruce liked "Messages" after a rejection for a different story on the same day.

So, I have two stories to get out in the mail on Tuesday. That will bring my number up in stories circulating.

Have a good day.



Tuesday, January 11

I'm ready to go to the post office. Usually I update the Storyboard after I mail something, but I thought I'd break the rules and update it right before I mail. Nothing should happen between now and then to keep me from the post office.

I'm only mailing one story, the one I got back from Asimov's the other day. I'm going to wait on the one to Rosebud because I need my brother word processor back at my apartment. "Messages" is a older story, so it's stored on an older writing machine. There's some changes I need to do to the manuscript (nothing major!) so I'm going to try to mail it on Saturday. Plus, after my journal entry on Sunday I realized I had sent Messages to last quarter's Writers Of The Future. Since Rosebud accepts simultaneous submissions, even encourages it, I'm going to send "Messages" there anyway.

This is the second time this story has been to Writers of The Future. I figured since there is a change in Coordinating judge-- Wolverton before, Budrys now--I thought I'd try the story on this contest again. After all, I didn't have a new one to send, and then that would have been two quarters missed in a row.

My story gets critiqued at the workshop tonight. More on that later.

Take care.



Thursday, January 13

I had a 1000 word story critiqued at the workshop the other night. Good sound advice in those comments and I got some good ideas as to what to do with it. A rewrite should be reletively painless and it might get to be more than 1000 words, but not much more. No more than 2000 words, I bet.

***********************************

We have an e-mail list for our writing group. This allows easy communication between workshops. Sometimes discussions, although we don't get those too often on the list. Dean Smih and Kris Rusch keep in touch with the workshop through that list. They live on the Oregon coast. As well as Steve and Chris York, who have moved recently to the coast.

The last week has been busy on that list. Twenty or more e-mails a day on some days. There has been talk about drive vs. talent, using pseudonyms, and how many books are being published right now compared to past years. Dean and Kris have strong opinions on the right attitude to have in the pursuit of a writing career.

Here's part of that discussion, a question from another writer on the list and then the answer from Dean:

>>>5) Assuming desire, the absense of talent, the stupidity required love
working on fiction, and an unnatural desire to seek criticism, what characteristics of personality can be cultivated to improve break-in odds?>>>>>

>>>>>Great question. My answer is, at once, courage. Courage to quit a day job and work part time to get your goal. Courage to put stuff in the mail and write more. Courage to get out and meet editors and other people. Courage to just keep going against all the garbage people toss at you. Fear is with us all. But those of us who make it have more desire and courage than those who don't. That simple. And has nothing to do with talent. Just courage and desire, and maybe the ability to learn and understand practice. Practice, practice, practice.>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

I admire Dean's drive and what he has accomplished. I admire the drive and persistence of other writers I have met and others I have read about (that includes online journals). I've been cultivating that drive and desire inside of me. I'm getting out of my own way. In my mind, I don't think there is another way to make a living off of fiction writing. One has to write a lot and get a lot of manuscripts out there.

I'm not there yet. Sometimes I feel like a glacier.

Getting rid of my day job sounds great. I've been getting frustrated working on the grounds crew of a golf course, not being a golfer, and knowing I want to be a writer. It's come to this: I feel the need to either go seasonal on the golf course, or find another job. The other job could be part time, but you know it's not always easy. I have to get rid of some of this debt first. Then ask how much--bare minimum--can I live off of each year. Don't forget writing conventions and conferences.

Before I do anything with the day job, I must use my spare time wisely. As long as I'm still missing days of writing and not writing when I'm suppose to, there is no point worrying about doing anything with the day job yet.

More Later.





Saturday, January 15

I got "Messages" off to Rosebud today.

Also, an apologetic rejection from Talebones. Patrick said lately they have received a lot of stories that made them sit up and take notice. That left tough choices. He had to return my story, but only because of tough choices. He also added "good luck with it" and "do try us again."

So that was a kind rejection. Within hours of getting that story back from Talebones, it was back out in the mail again. To Weird Tales. I am so proud of myself for the quick resubmission.

Now let's see if I can get some writing done today.



Tuesday, January 25

I'm done housesitting today. I have to load up the car and do some cleaning and then I'm going back to the apartment. Damn, I didn't use the hot tub as much as I would have liked to.

I'll try to update again later. There's been no writing news, no rejections. I do know I need to get a story finished for next Tuesday's workshop. It will be done!

More later.



Thursday, January 27

I got some writing done tonight. I'll try to do more later. This story has to be done for Tuesday's workshop.

I'm planning on writing at least four stories in February. How ambitious of me. Dare To Be Bad Challenge runs from Feb. 16-21. Write three stories in six days. Don't think. Just write. Don't rewrite during this challenge. Write a first draft and move on to the next story. In her newsgroup at SFF.Net, Julia West mentioned this challenge, but I guess Nina Hoffman and Dean Smith have done challenges like this before. Nine of us so far in the workshop have accepted the challenge. This should be interesting. Man, I'm crazy.

The fourth story will be written during a Rockaway weekend at the end of Feb. Rockaway Beach is a small coastal town where twelve of us rent a beach house (owned by Oregon Writers' Colony) and write stories and then critique them on Sunday night. The atmosphere there is like Clarion, a synergy created by all the writers under one roof.

I know what stories I'm going to write for the challenge and Rockaway. For the challenge it is beneficial to know what I'm going to write. I'm going to have scene by scene objectives.

This is really pushing myself, but I don't feel like backing down.