Ashley Ream

I have been known, from time to time, to write open letters to Bill Gates on this very blog. Mostly, I like to congratulate him on his fine software and assure him that those catastrophic bugs that keep cropping up are no problem for me. Nope, I like a challenge. And now that I'm working on my brand spanking new laptop, pre-loaded with Windows Vista, I'm really getting the opportunity to stretch my patience muscle.

(Oh, and to the Hewlett-Packard people who included that trial-size bottle of Xanax in my hardware shipment, good on you!)

For example, the fact that Vista keeps randomly turning off functionality to my external mouse - boy, that just gives me the giggles like you wouldn't believe. Oh! And when Word randomly changes all of my default settings to strange things like "Calibri, 11 point" and then refuses to change them back, I love that!

But the best thing EVER is when I spend hours honing the perfect cover letter to a perspective agent, including the requested 50 sample pages of work, only to have Outlook delete everything but the first four paragraphs for no apparent reason, just as I was hitting "send."

AWESOME!

In fact, I love it so much, I feel moved to haiku.

Sloppy code, don't care
Practically monopoly
I am sad (facedesk)*

* http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=facedesk

Ashley Ream Dispatches from the City of Angels I'm a writer and humorist living in and writing about Los Angeles. You can catch my novel LOSING CLEMENTINE out March 6 from William Morrow. In the meantime, feel free to poke around. Over at my website you can find even more blog entries than I could fit here, as well as a few other ramblings. Enjoy and come back often.
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Previous Entry :: Next Entry Read/Post Comments (3) Share on Facebook Like me! Follow me! Favorite Quotes: "Taint what a horse looks like, it�s what a horse be." - A Hat Full of Sky by Terry Pratchett "Trying to take it easy after you've finished a manuscript is like trying to take it easy when you have a grease fire on a kitchen stove." - Jan Burke "Put on your big girl panties, and deal with it." - Mom "How you do anything is how you do everything." Want E-Mail Updates? Click here, type your e-mail address into the first field (for public entries) and receive an e-mail note each time a new blog post goes up. Absolutely, positively no spam. Promise.		2008-02-05 12:11 PM Windows Vista, a love letter in haiku I have been known, from time to time, to write open letters to Bill Gates on this very blog. Mostly, I like to congratulate him on his fine software and assure him that those catastrophic bugs that keep cropping up are no problem for me. Nope, I like a challenge. And now that I'm working on my brand spanking new laptop, pre-loaded with Windows Vista, I'm really getting the opportunity to stretch my patience muscle. (Oh, and to the Hewlett-Packard people who included that trial-size bottle of Xanax in my hardware shipment, good on you!) For example, the fact that Vista keeps randomly turning off functionality to my external mouse - boy, that just gives me the giggles like you wouldn't believe. Oh! And when Word randomly changes all of my default settings to strange things like "Calibri, 11 point" and then refuses to change them back, I love that! But the best thing EVER is when I spend hours honing the perfect cover letter to a perspective agent, including the requested 50 sample pages of work, only to have Outlook delete everything but the first four paragraphs for no apparent reason, just as I was hitting "send." AWESOME! In fact, I love it so much, I feel moved to haiku. Sloppy code, don't care Practically monopoly I am sad (facedesk)* * http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=facedesk Read/Post Comments (3) Previous Entry :: Next Entry Back to Top