Gah! SD called out on fb for a proof-reader for her article on LGBTQ progress (the Q is either American or new or a mistake, I reckon) and I volunteered, did the first bit using the 'tracker' thing on Word that Son showed me, sent it off, had a spliff, then got a return email saying she didn't have Word and none of it came through so I've just done heroic Concentrating Very Hard to get her a copy, cos like I said the other day, she's my girl.

It's funny stuff to read though. Funny peculiar and funny haha. The style is gossip mag - I don't really know what to call it - I open a lot of blogs by young women who write in this style and they ain't fer me, but SD is OMG-ing about serious important stuff, so maybe it's some kind of spoofy thing in an LGBTQ magazine.

One of the things I like about her is that her standards of personal hygiene are even lower than mine. YD and I had a laugh about that when we were talking about the wedding. SD and LB (another of YD's best pals), who will both be bridesmaids are often visibly grubby and have on occasion both been a bit whiffy, which makes three of us, or in fact four as YD herself is only marginally less shower-resistant than me, so she can shut the fuck up.

Anyway, enough about them, this is about ME! I seem to be double-dating blog-wise these days. I love my new journalscape blog, but I started to miss diaryland so I started cutting and pasting to both places, which may perhaps be redundant. I do like my stats at d'land because they tell me where people are from (apart from the meanies who hide their location), or at least where their ip address is registered. So I know that 'Grimsby' is still reading *waves* and 'Manchester' *coooeeee* and that someone in Kuwait has been back a few times, which is exciting (hi!).


I've gone a bit nocturnal again, up all night and asleep all day and here I am now, at 1.15, having not even got to the thing I was going to blog about and unsure whether or not to go to bed or just keep blethering on. Singing group is on tomorrow and I've only been once this year. Now it's turned into a 'thing', not going, and I don't know how to get myself back there. Well I do, it came to me as I wrote that last sentence - I need to ask someone to pal me to the door, but it's a bit late for tomorrow.

I had a kind of epiphany the other day about living quite a solitary 'real' life whilst having such an active virtual life: my sense of nationality has become a bit hazy, to whit, sometimes I forget I'm not American. I read Americans' blogs, have FB friends, I've visited, so have some of them, the telly is all American (not all, but shitloads), they tell us about the Oscars and the Superbowl, like we care, US Halloween has seen off dear old bonfire night - who knows where the fuck I'm living, but I feel involved with it all. And sometimes in the most unfortunate way - if someone posts something about an outrageous injustice or vile act by a politician I tend to react identically, without regard to whether or not this is 'my' problem - I just want as many people as possible to know this shit is happening, to 'us', which just seems like all of us. It's not a criticism of any of my friends, we're the Us that They are taking for suckers, no matter where we are. Sometimes it's about remembering how far we've come, in my lifetime ffs, when it all seems to be hopeless, like this one (which may get taken down - the copyright claims seem random for stuff designed to be viral):



I mean, as soon as I saw this I thought firstly, yes, good on you Hilary, and second that IT WAS US DID THAT - made it almost incredible that a person could be shut out like that, just for being female - we did that, us 70s and 80s wave feminists, including me and my mates and Hilary Clinton.

I want to poke people in the eye who take all this stuff for granted but reject the very idea of feminism. What do you think happened, fuckers? Did the men suddenly decide it was unfair to pay women teachers less than men, for women to be refused contraception without their husband's signature, unfair to never let their voice be heard in any public arena? I can remember the howls of ridicule at the suggestion that a woman could read the news - who did they think could or would take anything a woman said seriously?

Ach, I was getting a bit ranty there, you get my point, I'm sure. Or not - I cannot possibly be sure.

I've decided I don't care about being nocturnal - I remember Barb/witty was all in favour of it for the artistic types. Time to concentrate and focus in the stillness of the night when all around are sleeping.

At which point I had a wave of weariness, but I've uploaded the photos now, so on we go.

Attempting to take a 'view' photo, left home by car for highest point on the downs (sorry, but the line of hills that runs across the bottom of England is called the downs) in bright sunshine and a strong wind. Before I got there the sky darkened; the rain and I collided in the car park:



but I was there and what the fuck, I put my hood up and took some pics on my phone, loads of them cos it was dead dramtic, much more so than I managed to capture:





I got fucking soaked through with icy cold rain, so tried for a coffee, or anything hot, in the pub but had to settle for a brandy:



I was brave about it. You'd have been proud.

Then the rain started to clear on the way back



and in the end this was my favourite pic:



and this is the view down my street, which, as you can see was almost dry again by the time I got home:



Today I am grateful for: coming across this , which I only watched a bit of, but it went click click click in my brain and I shall watch it properly tomorrow; speaking to ED on the phone when she was tucked up ready for bed; the internet; friends; drugs

Sweet dreams xx