Here is a term from my psych glossary:

Cheater detector - A mechanism that humans have developed to detect individuals who seek the benefits of social exchange without reciprocating appropriately.

Wonderful us. We are so smart with all our names for things. The study of psychology teaches that we are all the same in different ways. It's rare to be able to accuse someone of acting some way worth mentioning without experiencing it ourselves. Maybe we fight the urge, but we still feel it. Anything I want from my husband, for instance, is usually something I am failing to give to him. A coworker of mine said he will treat customers as poorly as they treat him because they should not get away with disrespecting people like that. In other words, he sacrifices his own good time to be a stranger's mirror, to teach them a lesson. Maybe he's just trying to be empathetic. Either way is a lot of work for one little pizza chef.

Here is another:

Cognitive cool system - Processing system that generates cognitive thought processes and thoughtful, reflective reactions and plans; based in the hippocampus and frontal lobe.

Need coolant for that?

And another:

Ought self - The representation of who you believe you should be.

I should be going now.

But I'm not. I'm adding to this.

To be true to ourselves is to do what makes us happy. I don't think anyone can say withholding love or intending to harm another makes them happy. We can't teach anyone unless they are on the wavelength of being taught. The journey is personal, though we are all on one.