That's what my eighth grade science teacher, Mrs. Woodard, always said. And I think we all have a special place in our hearts for the teacher we dissected earth worms with. But that's for another day. The meat and potatoes of this post is this:

When Lloyd was just a babe I regularly made the comment that I wanted a mechanic and a hairdresser out of these kids ... and hoped Lloyd would be the mechanic. Months later, news of Dallas increased my chances of birthing a mechanic, though at two he's more the hairdresser type.

Lloyd likes pipes. He liked pipes instead of answering questions for his preschool rhyming assessment, he likes Wal-Mart for its ceiling pipes, he likes old buildings for their many electrical and heating pipes, he likes what is under the sink, he brought toy pipes for show-'n-tell, and his favorite toy of late is the plastic tubing I bought him at the Home Depot for under $5. He is mechanic material.

The reason I bring up my humble wish for one of my boys (sorry, Rachel, just don't think you have it in you to want to get your hands permanently dirty) is that I had to have my van towed two consecutive days, and $600 later it still sits at the mechanic's. The mechanic customer service guy, Ned, after the second tow, called me to say the van is starting right up and they don't see anything wrong with it. Good thing they're paying for the second tow. Um, Ned, do you think I am making up a story that after $600 my car won't start just so I can have it towed and be without it again? Ned? Ned? Is that what you're saying?

It was a bad omen when it wouldn't start the first time we picked it up. Aaron dropped Dallas and me off (Rachel and Lloyd stayed home) and left immediately for work. Great. All set. Try not to think about the $600. Start her up ... start her up ... What the?

She wouldn't start!

I rolled my window down to tell a mechanic nearby that my van didn't sound good. He tried it for me and managed to get it started. He said maybe the engine was flooded. Well, whatever it was it smelled bad. I mean, there were major fumes in the car. Luckily the mild winter weather allowed me to crack the window, but still, it gave me a headache the entire day. I let it run the five minutes he suggested but had to get Rachel on the bus so I left without having them look at it for me. I figured if something was wrong later, which it wouldn't be after a $600 tune-up, I'd call Ned and tell him.

Thank God the van got me to and from my errands all morning! I'm the last person without a cell phone so Lloyd would have literally been stranded at school if I was stuck somewhere $600 in the hole. Yeah, the money is a lot to me.

Hours later I went to nab Rachel from the bus stop up the street because the weather started turning cold, and the van didn't feel like starting. Three or four times I tried her. Nothing. I called Aaron. I made Aaron call Ned. Ned told Aaron to call for a tow, which he'd cover the cost of due to the circumstances. Aaron told Ned to call for the tow. I waited. I called for the tow. I called Ned, the truck came as soon as I did. OK, Ned, we're in business. It was almost 5:00 PM and the garage was only open for another hour. The tow guy got the van to start. He also crumpled the note I wrote to Ned, taped to the steering wheel. It said "Ned, go ahead and patch the tire you said had a nail in it but didn't fix the first time and told my husband I said not to fix." No, it said just to patch the tire.

Oh yeah, and the tow guy said Mike told him to tell me he said Hi. Who's Mike? Apparently he's the guy Ned replaced. I don't care, really. You guys are liars and don't give a rat's butt that you are inconveniencing and overcharging me. You probably put the nail in my tire too. Tell Mike that was nice of him to remember us.

I called Ned today--thank goodness mother nature made it a snow day so I didn't need to taxi kids to school and the bus--and he asked me what's up. What's up? You know, Ned, my car happens to be sitting at your place instead of my place. He said they didn't find anything wrong and the van is starting for them. That's it! They must have treated my van better than I do so my van is being difficult for me because it would rather be with them. I knew this was going to happen if I let anybody touch her. Damn! I'll have to coax her to be my friend again, win back her trust.

The boys are three and two. The one still likes to sample everything with his tongue. Maybe summer will be a good time to start them investigating under the hoods of our cars. Yeah, I'll wait till then. They'll be four and almost three come summer. For now all I can do is read them The Art of Motorcycle Maintenance in parentese before bed.