Conversation Starved By Day - One of the strangest things about my life is my current employment. I'm a sub-contractor for the military which means I have a job like a civilian, but I'm not employed directly by the government. The government has a contract, and the parent company won the bid and they "own" the contract right now. Then they go and hire sub-contractors to work on that contract, in various types of industries. They hire some people to do physical labor, some to do software support, some to do computer analysis, and so on. The subcontracting companies hire employees directly, handle HR and insurance and benefits and payroll, and they bill the parent company for the actual personnel sent out on the contract. With me so far?

So I work for one of the subcontracting companies. My paycheck is signed by my subcontractor boss. But I work "for" a boss on the contract who belongs to the parent company. He runs a team of half parent-company employees and half sub-contractors. Every member of the team is based out of completely different cities, states, and time zones. And in the latest re-organization of this portion of the contract, I work on the Navy base in an office 95% of the time. There's very little I can do at home anymore, because most of my data for analysis can only be accessed with all the fancy military security in place. Still with me?

I've been "on base full-time" since mid-March (which seems like forever ago). It's sorta nice, because I can wander in at any hour because my co-workers are all in different states and time zones, so no one cares what time I actually "show up" at the office. But that means if I sleep in a bit, have breakfast, and check email in the morning at home, I might get to work at 11 am, which means I'm not done working until 7 pm or later (like if I actually eat lunch), and then I'm racing off to whatever I have in the evenings.

I never really thought about why I pack my evenings with lots of things -- whether that's meetings or workshops or dinner with friends -- until a friend asked me today "don't you need some alone time?" and I realized I'm completely isolated and alone for my entire work week. There's no one that calls me on the phone, there's no one who works in my wing of my office. So I'm literally alone and have no one to talk to from waking up at 6 or 7 am until I leave the office around 5 or 6 or 7 pm. So by the evening, I'm dying for human interaction, and I go meet up with people. But this also means that I'm pressed for that "alone time" at home with the computer just to finish personal emails again and then continue work on websites and other stuff. No wonder I'm over-committed in the evenings: I'm human-starved and need the interactions. I crave that conversation that I'm deprived from at work. Some people would probably love to have the isolation of my job. I'm sometimes withering from it.
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So what did I do with my day today? Let's see, I finished typing some of the baronial newsletter notes in the morning. The next issue is due out Saturday so I'm aiming to publish on Friday. To get it out on time, I've been trying to portion the work out every day this week.

I finished updating some records in my financial spreadsheet, making certain all my bills are paid, I know all my balances, and I've double-checked which bills need to be paid next.

I worked on adding some details to my dayrunner. Then I re-read some of my "apprenticeship notes" and spreadsheets, and made some new notes to work on updating later. My favorite record-keeping system centers around typing up my notes, then carrying around the printouts for hand-written updates and brainstorming. Then I type the updates and make fresh printouts for more brainstorming later. It's astonishing how much information and revision I've come up with in only 1-2 weeks, and it's very encouraging. It's also forcing me to spend more time getting my calendar up-to-date so I can schedule little details for myself to attack regularly.

I finished making some of the arrangements for this weekend. Saturday Bill and Jeff and I will carpool up to the northern camping event (in SCA jargon, it's a "war"), to spend just the day together at the event. Then I'll either come all the way back home, or just sleep on Jeff's couch Saturday night (and Bill will go back home to his place). Sunday, Jeff and I drive down to the southern camping event (a different war), to spend the day and night on site. I still have one more email to confirm our camping location on Sunday, and then on Labor Day, I just have to be home in time for dinner with Rae.

I went over to fighter practice and spent time on Scott's fighter "dress." The false neckline is basted into place, and one of the side seams is pinned and ready for the sewing machine. Scott comes over for dinner on Thursday, so I need to have it completely pieced together for a final fitting.

After fighter practice, we typically go out to eat at a local IHOP. I've been limiting myself to "just coffee" when we go out, most weeks, but tonight I just had to have an order of onion rings. They weren't my ideal favorite version of onion rings, but I definitely needed more solid food than just coffee. I've been doing wonderfully with weight loss and portion control lately, and actually the fight is not so much about trying to eat less, but trying to avoid eating too little and letting myself fall too far into old eating-disorder thoughts. The good news is that just 2 days ago I was 1/2-pound away from my personal best. Then it's only 8 pounds from my first (original) goal ... the first 34 pounds I wanted to lose. I started 18 months ago and I'm reliably staying at 26 pounds lost total. I want those next 8 very much, so I stepped up my efforts again. Besides my weekly walks on Monday with Meala, this evening I committed to a weekly walk on Wednesdays at fighter practice with Aliskye. This thrills me to no end, since I've been looking for a way for a second once-a-week item to stick. This has great potential. (And we actually went on a walk around the park this evening, even though I was still in work-heels. Time to pack my tennies in my car again.)

And Bill has started to let me read through his 1000+ sci-fi library, 1 or 2 books at a time. I devoured a Connie Willis book on Tuesday, and swaped it for 3 more by the same author this evening. And Bill might be able to come teach me something about MySQL and PhP (programming for websites) some time, and I'll figure out what I can swap in trade for him -- some heraldry consultation, etc.

Now it's time to curl up in bed, and maybe read a quick short story that he recommended. G'night, my dearhearts.

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Today's Blessing That I'm Thankful For: Some days I find I'm thankful for people I've already thanked in this space. Then I realize, what a blessing that these people are *still* and *always* such a major and wonderful influence in my day-to-day life. This evening was filled with many friends, a huge blessing for which I'm extremely thankful.