The L.A. Times printed an article yesterday that just got my blood boiling.

Simon and Schuster has sanitized "Nancy Drew".

I'm serious! According to an article written by Annie Linskey (well written, too), they've got new writers, but all the same old gang - Nancy of course, George, and Beth, and Ned Nickerson - even the housekeeper, Hannah Gruen. But apparently the old Nancy was too rough for modern children.

They talk about the old series:

"What do you really remember about the teen-girl sleuth? She was hit on the head more times than a prizefighter. Bad guys were forever gagging her and tying her up. She took the law into her own hands rather than going to the proper authorities. She sped around town in a little blue roadster. And the spunky little terrorist even used dynamite to destroy property. Volume after volume contained frightening images, unsafe adventures and dicey characters. Is this the kind of literature you want to invade the impressionable brains of young children?

"If you worry about that...there is some splendid news.

"The new volumes have been stripped of most of the aforementioned perils. Clifhangers, tension and suspense that kept children reading have been replaced with low-carb modern slop."

I can't believe it. They've even pulled the old versions off the shelf, without plans to publish them again. (So hang on to them, people! I have mine safely stashed.)

I haven't been this disgusted with a publishing house since - well, ever, I think.

Sanitized. That'll be on poor Nancy Drew's headstone.