Well, PT was good. A new exercise was added. Not hard, in fact almost had me giggling at first, but as you do it you feel it. And the exercise that caused my knees to hurt on Tuesday, he adjusted cause "causing pain is not the name of the game".

Meeting with Bishop N(that is what we call our pastor) was good. I told him flat out that after 33 years in this relationship I could no longer honestly say I loved my husband. That I was one step away from leaving. There was no cheating, no substance abuse, no physical abuse. There was a caring, but the love for my husband was gone. And ever since I admitted that to my husband, my health was improved. The Bishop acknowledged that and then asked B what he thought the problems were-B just said that we didn't know how to argue.

The the Bishop starting digging in a little. B said something that he never had a problem with me going to church, talking about church-even when he couldn't attend because of his feelings. That he supported me going.. And the Bishop caught it, caught what I heard for years!! Yes, there was a problem, there was anger underneath the words and the Bishop called B on it. Took B by surprise!!!! Also called B on the fact that B claims that his hard feelings and his memory loss makes him feel lacking. Cause he recognizes how he use to be able to remember things and now he can't. So the Bishop said, "Now you're like the rest of us!"

I told Bishop about being it all for B, but I needed more than B. He related to it immediately!! And he told B that he should be thankful that I WANT OUTSIDE life of my own. That I am not reliant on him for a life. Talk about validation.

B made sure Bishop knew about separate sleeping arrangements. And I was wrong. No comment about B coming back to the bedroom AT ALL!! I think that surprised B alot. B made comment once we got home about getting out the inflatable bed. Yup, he was surprised. Also surprised when Bishop said that over time emotional hurts can feel like physical hurts. B had told him how I flinched from B.

Church Social Services will be contacted for a list of counselors in our area. We will be paying-though cost is usually less than if we tried to find one on our own. We also got some reading assignments to read separately and to talk about, and we go back in two weeks.

Bishop also called B out on the fact that the local Church was welcoming to him when he got to DC. And B didn't pick up from there. B dropped the ball. I don't think that B is going to find this as friendly to him as he expected.

When we got home, for the first time, he got an extra blanket and put it on his chair. He knows that he's not going back to the bedroom for a long time.

The only thing that I had to give was a commitment to try until August. And to me, I had given that commitment already.

I was validated!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


By a church that is very traditional!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!