Silly Thinking

ST PREMIERE WEEK!

STNews presents…

The Road To Election Day.

Here, from our New York World News Headquarters in New Jersey, is chief meteorologist, and senior fellow at Fellows and Gals University Dan Rather Center for Fictional Journalism: Connie Chung.



CC: Good afternoon and welcome to STNews’ new program “The Road To Election Day”. Every Monday right up to November 2nd we will putting the latest campaign news in perspective and context with new and used reports on the campaign.
Today we will analyze the results of ST’s latest polling on the Presidential election.
ST’s latest Zulu-POW poll shows a very close race. Here with analyze is the man who played the President in the movie “Independence Day”, and my co-host on these broadcasts, Bill Pullman.
Good afternoon Bill.


BP: Good morning Connie.



CC: Bill, what have you learned while reading these poll numbers?


BP: Thank you Connie, and good afternoon again everyone. This poll was interesting, we asked 1200 perspective voters, in no contest states, if the election was held today, who would you be most likely to vote for.
49% said President Bush, with a margin of error of 32%.
49%. said John Kerry.
.025% said Ralph Nader,
.018% said Dan Rather.
the rest were undecided.



CC: Dan didn’t do to well, uh Bill?


BP: No Connie, he didn’t. We think this is because of the mess over the President’s National Guard duty at CBS News.



CC: Interesting.


BP: Yeah, and if you look at how it fell on specific questions, it’s even more interesting.
When we asked who do you must trust on International terrorism, 82% said Kerry, 12% said Bush, 6% said Dan Rather, and 1.575 said Ralph Nader.
Now, who do you trust on domestic issues, 95% said John Kerry, 2% said Bush, 3% Rather, and Nader didn’t place. Among those who owned Corvair’s, however, 2.9% went Nader.



CC: Bill, one thing I’m noticing here is people don’t seem to support the President on specifics but when it comes to voting it’s much closer, why do you think that is?


BP: Interesting question Connie.



CC: Yeah, well…


BP: No it is.



CC: Go on with you.


BP: When we asked who do you think is more likely to harm you, personally, if he doesn’t win the vote in November? A whopping 86% thought Bush would personally seek revenge and harm them, 12% thought Rather would harm them, and only 2% thought Kerry would seek them out and harm them. Most didn’t think Nader could find their house, but if he could they would scare him off with a garden hose.



CC: So their scared?


BP: Terrified, Connie. They’re scared to death of the President.



CC: Thank you Bill. So there you have it. On domestic and foreign affairs Kerry wins a sizable chunk of the vote, but those same voters are split almost 50- 50 on who they’d vote for for President, because they’re afraid President Bush would harm them personally if he looses the election.
Join me tomorrow here at ST for “1 on 1” when my guest will be Governor Jeb Bush on why Florida is being punished by God.
And join us Thursday for a Special Report on the First Preidential Debate.
For all of us at ST News Good night.

STNews we take the non out of non fiction, but not as bad as CBS does.