Silly Thinking

STNews presents


ST1 on 1


Now, from our New York STNews World Headquarters in New Jersey is chief meterologist and your host, Connie Chung.



CC: Good afternoon.
Today, as we approach Thanksgiving and the beginning of the holiday season, we thought we would talk to ST’s resident psychic and sooth sayer, Doctor Mystico about the outlook for the holidays.
Hello Doctor.



DM: Hello Connie Chung. OHHH! Hello everyone.


CC: Doctor Mystico, how has the spirit world reacted to the presidential election?



DM: Ohhh. Connie Chung. The spirits are very angry. Angry indeed.


CC: Why Doctor?



DM:: Ohhhh.
Your kidding, right?


CC: No. What’s the problem?



DM: Connie Chung. The spirits wanted Theresa Heinz Kerry to win. They love that daffy dame!


CC: You mean John Kerry.



DM: Dead already. Walking dead. Would have been first zombie President since Gerald Ford. OHHHH!


CC: Doctor, what is the outlook for the world over the holidays?



DM: Ohhh. The spirits say… the spirits say… OOHHH.
Less luxury more function.


CC: What does that mean?



DM: Money tighter. People scared. So much fear, so much tryptifan.


CC: And what about George Bush. How does the spirit world view him?



DM: My head hurts. Very bad. He very bad man. Tool of evil
TOOL OF EVIL CONNIE CHUNG! TOOL OF EVIL AND THE MISGUIDED.


CC: Oh my.



DM: ..AND STUPID. TOOL OF EVIL, MISGUIDED, AND STUPID.


CC: Well…



DM CONNIE CHUNG?


CC: Yes Doctor Mystico.



DM: Did I say stupid?


CC: Yes.



DM: Well good then.


CC: Anything else?



DM: OHHHH! Yes. Something is coming….


CC: Yes?



DM: Something is….
Remember if you have turkey problems to call the Butterball Helpline at 1-800 Butball.


CC: Alright.



DM: BUTBAL, BUTBAL, BUTBAL.


CC: Thank you…



DM: 1-800 BUTBAL. OHHHH! I love saying it. Say it with me Connie Chung.


CC: Butball?



DM: Butbal, BUTBAL.

ST IS!



DM: BUTBAL! ST IS BUTBAL!!!