Silly Thinking

A “Marlon Brando” Classic.

Here is Leonard Peltier.


LP: Hello, I’m Leonard Peltier, It was my great honor to be the announcer on “The Marlon Brando Show” that was shown right here on ST until Marlon's death last June.

Today, we thought we’d look at one of my personal favorite shows. It aired the day after Thanksgiving Day, one year ago and features guests Kermit The Frog and Vice President Dick Cheney.
I love the conversation Marlon and I have about the holiday and the way he handles each guest with customary good humor and respect.
I hope you agree and enjoy this classic "Marlon Brando” show.

(cue music)

From Hollywood!



It's "The Marlon Brando Show" starring



MARLON BRANDO....

Marlon's guests tonight

KERMIT THE FROG!


and The Vice President of the United States: DICK CHENEY!

With musical group Teething Babies!


with Sy Henderson and the Marlon Brando Orchestra.


I'm Leonard Peltier.
And now... MARLON BRANDO!!!!!


MB: Hello. Thank you ladies and gentlemen.




MB: Thank you. You're too kind. Thanks. Now knock it off.
Well, welcome to our Special Holiday edition of our show. Although it's not really a holiday, but the day after a holiday. Still, for a lot of you it's a day off.
Well, did you all have a nice Thanksgiving?




MB: Yeah? Really? Good. Me too. I'm still full. Oh my God almighty did we eat. I'm stuffed. I had some of guys and gals from the show over to my house. Leonard?


LP: Yes sir. Yes.


MB: You were there, weren't you?


LP: Yes. Yes sir.


MB: Did you have a good time?


LP: Well, yes. The food was good. I just try to ignore that the holiday celebrates the beginning of the end for my people.


MB: You and me both Kimosabe. Did you try those little cookies I made for dessert?


LP: Yes. They were different.


MB: Different! If I wasn't so sleepy I'd call you a venomous pig for that. But, I can hardly keep my eyes open.


LP: It's the tryptophan in the turkey...


MB:[slowly breathing in and out]


LP: Marlon?


MB: Wha? Oh my God in heaven. Kermit the Frog.


KTF: YEAAHHHH! Thank you! YEAHHH! Hi. Thank you.


MB: Little Kermit the frog. How are you?


KTF: Great. It's great to be here on The Marlon Brando Show.


MB: Is it easy being green? Is it easier now than it used to be?


KTF: No. Like Mister Peltier, I feel it's hard being an oppressed creature of color.


MB: He's an indian.


KTF: Yes, I know. Hi Leonard!


LP: Hi, Kermit. How are you?


MB: Hey, what is this a Luau or something? Now Kermit are you married to that pig?


KTF: Uhh, Miss Piggy?


MB: No, Roseanne. Yes, Miss Piggy.


KTF: Uhh. No. We were engaged, but then she met Russell Crowe and everything changed.


MB: I don't know what the hell you're talking about.


KTF: Me neither. Really. YEAHHH!


MB: Stop yelling will you. Now Kermit...I dunno. You got any movies or anything coming out?


KTF: Well no. Nothing new. The Muppets are not really in demand these days, but MGM/UA home video is releasing "A Muppet Christmas" on DVD.


MB: Great.
Vice president of the United States, Dick Cheney.


DC: Thank you, thank you. Hello Marlon, Kermit. Hey Leonard I want to see your green card later.


LP: ...


DC: Just kidding.


MB: Thank you for being with us, Mister Vice President.


DC: It's my pleasure Mister Brando. I watch your show.


MB: Great. Now, you fixed up an illegal war in Iraq and now you're making billions for your old company Haliburton. How did you manage that?


DC: Well that's not true. We went to war to stop the evil of terrorisim. The infrastructure of the region needs support and Haliburton is the best company to provide it. We're going to make sure that basic services are running so the free people of Iraq will have a foundation for a free and democratic way of life.


MB: Yeah right. But, how'd you do it? Make a profit from that much suffering?


DC: That's just silly thinking Mister Brando. The president and our team thought about this for a long time and decided that this was the right road to peace and we pursued it. I think we did and are doing the right thing.


KTF: Can I ask a question.


MB: Sure, Kermit.


KTF: Mister Cheney? What kind of man are you? The road to peace? Do people buy that crap? In the swamp we'd feed you to crocodiles for that kind of blatant lying. You have caused thousand to die in an illegal war and this is just the beginning.


DC: Ha, ha... I love the puppets. But, you're right, Kermit. This is just the beginning. This war on terrorism won't end in my lifetime. And probably not in yours.


KTF: Endless war? That's right out of Orwell's 1984. It's both a way to control the domestic population and to pilfer the world.


DC: My grandkids love you. Ha, ha. You know, it's really about defending freedom, and only people who believe in conspiracy theories think about it any other way, Kermit.


KTF: You know I worked with some pretty scary people in my day. We had Milton Berle on our show once. But you take the cake.


DC: Ha, ha.


MB: You are sick, man. You and your pimps in the White House have screwed us royal. And you sit there laughing. How do you sleep at night, murderer?


DC: Ha. That's a good question. Very well, thank you. When you know you're on the road to peace and you helped make the world a better place, a more secure place, you sleep very well.


KTF: Are you insane?


MB: Yeah... the little green piece of cloth brings up a good point. Are you nuts or something?


DC: Ha, ha. Well after my seventh heart attack my doctors did say I could suffer from dementia so it is quite possible that I am insane.


MB: And Bush, is he insane too?


DC: Just stupid. But sane as you or me or the talking frog.


MB: Well, you've just scared us all half to death, but thanks for coming on the show Dick Cheney.


DC: Ha, ha... thank you. Loved it.


MB: And Kermit...


KTF: Hey Marlon, do you think Mister Cheney heard a thing we said, or is he just a soulless reflex machine? Is he even in the room with us?


MB: No clue little green buddy.


DC: Ha ha.


MB: Goodnight.


LP: Marlon Brando's wardrobe by Hand Me Downs From The Circus. This had been a MarBran DougWoug Production in association with Harpo Productions.
This blog was recorded.