"I wrote what I need to remember, what I need to hear again and again: that life is full of beauty and pain; that the world will break your heart and heal it, over and over, if you let it, and that letting it do both is the only way to live fully; that we are not alone but rather deeply connected to that which creates and sustains all love." Oriah

Sums up where my head has been today. I cringe at the ease of my life to date. Then I wince when I remember that my life hasn't truly been easy and how could I forget my childhood? Different thoughts for a different post in a different forum.

For now, at this moment, at this point right here, I'm not feeling deeply connected to anything, least of all that which 'creates and sustains all love'.

I don't mean to be so terribly cynical. I don't know what I mean, not really. If I say I feel like a stranger to my own life, would that make sense? I sometimes catch myself watching myself, almost an out of body experience. I shake my head and wonder what the hell that woman thinks she knows about parenthood, marriage, love or life.

Naive and stupid.

"Fraud! Pretender!"

Won't I ever grow up? And what's that like, anyway?

---

This song is still one of the most romantic songs I know. It made me understand that the male of the species could indeed be as romantic, as sappy as females.

Albeit just no man I've known.

.dar.


soundtrack: Chris de Burgh - "Satin Green Shutters"