In a few hours there will be a memorial service for a little girl - the daughter of a very close friend. I can't be in attendance so I write.

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This morning, of all things, I realized I believe in reincarnation, but not like the mystics or religious leaders and huge populations of our earth. It was with Annabelle's death that a jarring realization ignited... that during my 66 years, I've lived many lives - dramatically different from one another. I've transitioned from one lifetime to another and had remarkable experiences and met remarkable people. I've never been much of a chameleon so my quirky self has followed throughout my many reincarnations.

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One of those lifetimes included Christy and Robert Buckner. Robby Bucking Buckingham is the nickname my husband gave him. For many years, he was Buck to most people. We double-dated in college. That was a long time ago - several lifetimes ago. The friendship flourished as we transitioned into marriage and parenthood in KCMO. I remember when the Buckner's third child arrived. She was a tiny, cute thing.

Her name was Annabelle. She was 37 when she died.

Between that lifetime and this lifetime, so much has happened, and none of it is going to be recorded here. Life is fluid. People and places change. We reincarnate into different people and different life experiences.

Below is Annabelle's obituary. I've been told that Christy gathered her children before Annabelle died and said, "Okay, let's get this done. Let's put together Annabelle's obituary." My memory hears Christy's voice - bell-ringing clear with upbeat tones laced with irony and wit.

I personally think it's quite grand what Annabelle and her family came up with. It's classic Christy. You will *get it* in a heartbeat why Christy and I were such close friends.

I've lived several lives since I last saw Christy. It hardly seems possible. I miss her. I think I need to plan a trip. Until then, I'll keep Christy and her family close to my heart. And the thing about living my reincarnations, I can revisit those memories with such tender and sweet and hilarious remembrance.

Safe travels, Annabelle.


ANNABELLE BUCKNER ALLEN

1976 - 2014 | Obituary



Annabelle Buckner Allen, 37, passed away, with her family by her side, on Monday, February 10, 2014. She was born Aug. 21, 1976, in Kansas City, Mo., to Robert and Christy Buckner. She was the youngest child, only by 15 months, which caused the relationships with her siblings to be quite "spirited." She excelled in school and was your typical over-achiever much to her siblings' annoyance. After a quick semester in Virginia for college, Annabelle changed her ever-changing mind and graduated early (no surprise) from the University of Kansas in 1998. After a couple of jobs in social work, she decided that it would be a lucrative career and decided to get her Master's in Social Work from KU, graduating in 2003. For the next several years, she worked in non- profits, wanting to make a positive difference in our community, eventually moving to Colorado for a change of scenery and new opportunities. Upon moving back to Kansas City to be closer to family and much to her father's dismay, she decided to change career paths to yet another profitable job, teaching. After graduating with honors from Rockhurst University in record time (mainly because no math was involved), Annabelle began teaching second grade at Red Bridge Elementary. This was her true calling. Unfortunately after only teaching for three months, she was diagnosed with non-smoking, terminal lung cancer. Despite fighting her illness, she continued and adored teaching for the next two years, finding humor and motivation through her students. To the surprise of everyone, in the summer of 2009, Annabelle's longtime friendship with an amazing man, Tom Allen, turned romantic and eventually led to marriage in 2011. Despite the bad luck with her health, Annabelle was proud to say that she and Tom had one of the greatest love stories of all time. Although no children of their own, Annabelle and Tom loved their nieces and nephew immensely and cherished their time they shared together. Annabelle will be known for her impeccable organizational skills, quick wit (she wrote that) and enormous charm (she wrote that too). One of her more memorable quotes forever will be, "My funeral will cost more than my wedding." Annabelle was preceded in death by her father, Robert Buckner; both grandfathers; paternal grandmother; and cousin, Erin. She is survived by her dashing husband, Tom; perfect mother, Christy; adorable sister, Margaret and her husband Jim; talented brother, Brad and his wife Amie; and so close to her heart, her nieces and nephew, Leila, Libby, Dorothy, Annabelle and Edwin. A memorial service will be held at 2:30 p.m. Saturday, Feb. 15, at Village Presbyterian Church, 6641 Mission Road, Prairie Village, Kan. In lieu of flowers, memorial contributions may be made to the Annabelle Buckner Allen Foundation for Lung Cancer Research, 1055 Broadway, Suite 130, Kansas City, MO 64105.