From 10 Zen Monkeys comes this...




It's a battle of pop culture titans as two empires -- one high-tech, one high-rise -- clash in explosive PR fury. Since these two heavyweight memes have climbed into the competitive media ring of their own volition, we thought we'd size them up for you. As Stephen Colbert would say: "Pick a side -- we're at war!"




iPhone: Simple to use.

Paris Hilton: Simple.



iPhone: Questionable protection against viruses.

Paris Hilton: Has herpes.



iPhone: Critics complained battery life too short.

Paris Hilton: Critics complained prison life too short.



iPhone: Provides driving directions.

Paris Hilton: Knows how to drive. (Sort of.)




iPhone: Responds to touch from multiple fingers at once.

Paris Hilton: Responds to touch from multiple fingers at once.



iPhone: Wants to be held by everyone.

Paris Hilton: Wants to be held by her mother.



iPhone: Sexy footage leaked onto the net.

Paris Hilton: Sexy footage leaked onto the net.



iPhone: Appeared in multi-million ad campaign.


Paris Hilton: Appeared in "House of Wax."



iPhone: Everyone wants what's in the box.

Paris Hilton: Everyone knows what's in the box.



Feel free to make your own comparisons in the comments...