Women of my generation have clearly lost their minds. Not that I can blame them, apparently being invisible and all. Now with Geraldine Ferraro making outrageous nut-jobber remarks she doesn't even seem to understand, and realizing our tragic generation was once proud of her as a "pioneer," you can see how deluded we are as well. Worse, only this week, a heroine of mine, Tina Brown, got it utterly wrong in Newsweek, saying all boomer women had to be for Hillary. Tina drank the victim Kool Aid.

So I want my peers to meet an original (begged for him to run) pro-Barack boomer 50-something careerist woman, who chose Barack above and beyond -- hear me, Geraldine, you utter moron -- from the best field of Democratic candidates we've had for years, many of whom I've been big fans of forever, for their various courageous stands on Central America (Dodd,) Iraq (Biden, Richardson and Kucinich.)

But Hillary? Never liked her. Many of my best friends and favorite women have always felt the same. Something unsettling about her. A feminist? Maybe. But a compromised one, having risen to fame as the victim of Monica and having been famously on bimbo eruptions in her White House patrol. She was the destroyer of Paula Jones and Gennifer Flowers, the very blue collar ladies she is now being saved by. Kind of yucky, really. And hanging in there, through all the humiliation, and that making her a star. Left a bad taste in my mouth. Moving on.

What about my generation's desperation that there will never be another female candidate? Why? Is our gender about to die out? Do you all know something I don't? I can understand the 80-year-olds, I guess. But to me, Hillary Clinton is merely the first credible candidate, and the most flawed. And the only one not to rise on her own coattails, which is the real reason she doesn't appeal to both me and many young, yes, in their own way, feminists. And what about Claire McCaskill? She's great! And she just emerged this year! Why do we act like Hillary is our last great chance? How damaged and pathetic. I see fantastic women in their 30s all the time. To wit, Chelsea's undamaged generation. Not polarizing, like us ceiling crashers. I can sympathize, I am, too.

Another issue is, you don't know what she really thinks. Did she vote that way on the war because it would make her look tough? Or is she really such a hawk? I know a lot of women who really believe she's a peacenik, but votes like a hawk because she has to look tough to men. I am not so sure. I think she's a hawk. But none of us know for sure. This is a problem for boomer Barack women like me, and young women, too.

And another thing. And I am not even going to get into how nutty her relationship is, and no, I don't want two for one. Al Gore didn't then, and I don't now. And it looked pretty ugly on the campaign trail so far. Anyway. This whole thing about being vetted: what's the hold up on her White House transcripts? Why withhold tax records, info on fundraising at the presidential library? Somehow I fear something lurking there in the bushes, pardon.

I hate when women identify as victims, act like victims, and love victims. And Hillary, as strong as she is, wins as a victim. That is the trajectory of her career. I am a victim. Punch. So why are women whining and the identifying with being the victim again? This is so un-Tina! Hillary was the victim of an oppressive media? Of being asked the first question? Poor baby. All that good coverage on Obama was about being the victor of 11 primaries in a row -- excuse us! And is Barack playing the victim of a real calumny? On Clinton's answer to the known question: "Are you a Muslim?" "Not as far as I know?" Are you not ashamed?

What are you talking about, unfair treatment? Compared to what?

And one last thing. What I saw that ugly week with Tex/Ohio, was a woman yelling, shrieking, mocking, changing her strategy every day. I can understand the desperation, but I can't understand smart women mistaking that for strength. When she said shame on you, I was ashamed. Does that make me a sexist? Since I am her peer and a woman? No, I wanted her to be strong but consistent, not lose her cool at 3 a.m. The way Senator Obama had behaved all week.

And now she is the killer of Hope. (It was just too delusional to manage). We are not that multi-racial post-oppression society that shocked the world and for a moment was its wonder. We are, thanks to Hillary's kitchen sink and staff, the same old America they thought we were. The racially charged, fractured America Bush & Rush left us with that Obama has the prescription to heal. The one that attracted us original believers during his miraculous 2004 convention speech then swept 11 primaries in a row and apparently had to be stopped (thanks, SNL). We are the broken polarized America she wants to rule, will to anything to rule.

That we have learned can't be ruled.

Which is why I was an original Barack Boomer Woman in the first place.