Happy International Tuba Day, everyone! Tubists of the world, unite!

You know, tuba players are often the butt of many jokes, get overlooked, and never woo as many chicks as the trumpet or sax players. The tuba is a heavy damn instrument, and you realize the full weight of one when you have to lug it around. You don't see many solo tuba players selling out auditoriums or amphitheaters full of fans.

However, tuba players are some of the coolest people I know. They provide the underlying tempo and bass for a wind ensemble. Their lung capacity far outstrips that of the coronet or French horn player, for the sheer fact that they have to push air through all that metal tubing; when you blow really hard, you can make a tuba sound like an elephant. They, like any group of people, come in different shapes and sizes: tall, short, thin, fat, male, female. They build up strength and endurance in the maintenance and care of their instruments. And they have wicked senses of humor.

Tuba players are the unsung heroes of any symphonic orchestra. They are dependable and reliable.

So kiss a tuba player today. God knows they deserve it.

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The Jane Austen Book Club by Karen Joy Fowler

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