I was making one of my infrequent forays into the abyss of network TV, when I saw an ad for Dermabond, a liquid stitch replacement, which ended with "Ask your emergency technician about Dermabond".

You know, if I am in an emergency room, probably the last thing I'm going to do is ask, "Could you use Product™? The pharmaceutical industry would really appreciate the money." Maybe while I'm at it, there's some other ways to tell them how to do their job?

It gets even better on the website, which tells you exactly how to ask about it:

"Doctor, I've heard of an innovative 'skin glue' called DERMABOND that can be used instead of stitches to close wounds. Can it be used to treat this wound?"

Note the "innovative" part, obviously hacked out by a marketing schill. I'm sure if you call it innovative, the doctor can't resist, since they don't want to look non-innovative, right? I'm not sure how you say Dermabond in all caps. Maybe with a dramatic pause and flourish.

I'm all for montioring your medical treatment and not treating doctors like they are infallable, but this is just silly.

edited multiple times, because HTML is hard