I feel like I am on a pivital moment in my life, like something so important is going to happen. I have the impression that I had damn well be together for it. Whatever the hell "it" is. Just a urgent feeling in the back of my mind. Maybe its just one of the two dozen side effects of the migraine medicine. Honestly, numbness, rapid eye movement, and memory loss really are worse than headaches.

I was given the comment today that people in general do not live their lives anymore, they simply go through them. That bothers me. The idea of opportunity and chances and hope and energy and God LIFE being missed out on. It is sad. I always told Jenna that God made the world beautiful for us to ENJOY it. We are meant to reveal in the sun and play in the grass and catch snowflakes on our tongues and admire flowers and trees and lakes and streams. It is hard sometimes. The beauty of it fades into the background and becomes mundane and ordinary. Average. We see it every day after all. But what if we looked at everything in life the way kids who have never seen snow view their first winter storm? The awe and excitement and energy in everyday life. Could you imagine it?

I realized something incredibly important yesterday. My dad never has a bad day. Ever. I always since for as long as I can remember have asked him how his day was. And he would always say good. Always. And proceed to name the stuff he did. He never named anything bad. When I was in his shop yesterday before we left for lunch he was frazzled at best. He raised his voice even. I could probably name the times I have heard my Dad raise his voice. I know I could count on one hand the times he has yelled. On the way to lunch I asked him if he was stressed. I had been so surprised to see him like that. He said nope. I asked how his day was. He said good. He proceeded to tell me what he got done. He didn't mention the students that were misbehaving when I was there. And I thought about this. It had never occurred to me before that my Dad didn't have perfectly behaved students year after year and good days every day. Everyone has a bad day. But not my Dad. I realized then that he chooses to focus on the good and not the bad. I was so amazed and impressed with my father at the moment. What an incredible way to live life. Simply by deciding to have a good day. No wonder after all my father has been through he is still sane. I have been told that I am the strongest person people know. Not compared to that man. My father is incredible. I cannot fathom that kind of strength. But I do know that your outlook changes everything.

And I think tomorrow will be a great day.

-kln-

Who understands this life that we are all going through?