I apologize for the horrible sadness of my journal recently, but life has been hard. I came into work today, to find out three more people had been laid off. One of them a friend of mine, and another one a really good friend of mine. Why can't I just work for a company that doesn't have the daily drama of watching your friends be abused.

Right now, I'm sitting in a dark office, that, until this morning, belonged to another employee. The employee who I didn't really know that was laid off this morning. I've been suffering from survivor's guilt for almost 2 months now, and it's really starting to wear on me.

The only thing that keeps me going from day to day is my girlfriend. She is a ray of brilliant light in my life, I don't think I could have made it through to this point without her. She's off right now at a writer's convention, but I hope she knows that I'm thinking about her every second.