Tagged by Keith. I thought he was my friend.

This is a meme. I was tagged. That means I'm supposed to answer these questions. It's a thing bloggers do, I guess. It's like a writing exercise. Except people read it. It's like that list of questions about your favorite color and flavor of ice-cream and favorite childhood sitcom a friend mass-emails until someone makes a disparaging comment. And that's that.

I'm not sure what "meme" means. I think of it as "me-me" because that's who it's about. Or the French, "meme" which means "same."

I'll dedicate this to my maternal grandmother who we called "Mem," short for Memere. A French-Canadian way of saying grandmother, I guess.

Anyway,


If you could have any one—and only one—bike in the world, what would it be?

A green Dahon Speed 7. It's the only one in my universe.


Do you already have that coveted dream bike? If so, is it everything you hoped it would be? If not, are you working toward getting it? If you’re not working toward getting it, why not?

I own that dream bike (I thought I was supposed to always call it a bicycle, now that I'm a cyclist). I will own another dream bike after my current dream bike collapses from the weight of all the peripherals I buy for it. My latest thought is a bottle cage. You know, the cage you put your water bottle in? I want that because I learned the name was "bottle cage" and noticed that my bicycle is outfitted with 2 holes into which I screw my bottle cage bolts. That seems reason enough for me.


If you had to choose one—and only one—bike route to do every day for the rest of your life, what would it be, and why?

It would be from NYC to Hawai'i. Why? Pfff.
I would probably meet Sponge Bob Square Pants on my way and that would be fun. And if my crotch didn't fall off from riding for so long, I would be in Hawai'i. And even though we've been there a number of times, it's still an absolute favorite place to be. Or at least reminisce about.


Do you ride both road and mountain bikes? If both, which do you prefer and why? If only one or the other, why are you so narrowminded?

I own my little folding bike. And I'm not the narrowminded one here. I didn't compose a meme asking questions only about bicycles. Yeesh.


Have you ever ridden a recumbent? If so, why? If not, describe the circumstances under which you would ride a recumbent.

I have never ridden a recumbent. I would ride one when I would feel like struggling to mount a bicycle and fall over a lot. Yesterday at Meryl and John's house I was sitting on their tire swing (redesigned in the shape of a horse) and I was talking on my cell phone, when the rope snapped and I fell forward onto the ground. And the 2x4 that held the 2 ropes apart above the swing fell on my head. Now I have a big scab on my head that no one asks me about. Maybe I'll compose a head scab meme.


Have you ever raced a triathlon? If so, have you also ever tried strangling yourself with dental floss?

I would have to look a lot better in spandex before I started racing a triathlon. Once I sliced my face in half with dental floss, trying to stimulate my molar gums.


Suppose you were forced to either give up ice cream or bicycles for the rest of your life. Which would you give up, and why?

What is this, "Sophie's Choice"? Forget it! I sobbed for 1/2 hour after that movie.


What is a question you think this questionnaire should have asked, but has not? Also, answer it.

Q: When will Stella and Maggie have their own bicycles?

A: As soon as I can figure out how to attach one of these to the back of my bike, they won't need to have their own bicycles.


You’re riding your bike in the wilderness (if you’re a roadie, you’re on a road, but otherwise the surroundings are quite wilderness-like) and you see a bear. The bear sees you. What do you do?

Pull out my mini-umbrella and offer it and the bike to the bear. They look so cute riding bicycles and holding a mini-umbrella. Oh gosh, and I had an extra tutu, I would offer that, too.


Now, tag three biking bloggers. List them below.

I only know 3 bloggers: Keith, Rachel and Gordon. One of them rides a bike. And he did one of these already.