Tonight I went to a lecture on women's health issues at a local church.

Sadly, I can't say I learned anything; I used to give a very similar lecture, only usually geared towards Hispanic and Native American women.

BUT it was worthwhile.

In any lecture on women's health issues, the topic of breast cancer comes up. Now, I'm aware that this is a very serious issue. I mean, a woman dies, what is it?, every fourteen minutes from breast cancer. My advisor for both degrees and major professor died from breast cancer. Two of my other profs had it at the same time. What I'm saying is I'm not trying to make light of the subject.

But when you have a very proper woman standing up in front of a bunch of older women (and me) in a CHURCH talking about nipples and showing how, because she's well-endowed, she gives herself self-breast exams, it's pretty entertaining. Also, she talked about how to watch your nipples to make sure they're as symmetrical as they're supposed to be. And then she made her hands into fists and curled and tucked and pointed her thumbs out so essentially you had two fist-breasts with thumb-nipples. Which was fine until she started waving her thumb-nipples around.

If mine could do that, Rice would never have to work again.

And in the meantime, ladies, I hope you're doing your own exam at least monthly. Don't want to do it? Teach your partner. :D And men can get breast cancer, too, so exams are a good idea there. Hey -- it's bonding time.