Like the chocolate binges I used to embark on the morning after a bountiful Halloween, I just can't get enough of Miss Britney Spears. How many times has the word "trainwreck" been used to describe the young woman who commanded a nation of teenage boys and served as the idol for many a prepubescent girl? I am not ashamed to admit that her antics are more interesting to me than the upcoming presidential election, the state of affairs in Iraq and the constant looming storm cloud of global warming. Call me shallow, call me ignorant, but honestly I'd rather hear about Britney being strapped to a stretcher than yet another report of a hundred Iraqi civilians being blown to pieces.

We all love Britney. She is the culmination of every girl's wildest fantasy. She embodied grace, purity, talent and sexuality for all those who never could call those traits our own. We sang her songs at our middle school dances, we stared at her toned abs in admiration, we dressed up like her for Halloween. Just as we built her up we have made it a sport to scrutinize each and every move the Louisiana native has made. Unfortunately, Britney must deal with the stresses life presents all of us--depression, addiction, child rearing, divorce--in the eye of the savage public, and last night the burden proved too much for her to handle. The woman clearly needs a lot of help and hopefully now she will see the err of her ways and begin to mend the shattered life she has led for the past year or so. We all want to see her bounce back to the way she was but we're much too eager to kick her when she's down. I cannot maintain my innocence. When I read about her hospitalization this morning I was nothing short of intrigued, checking the web site every hour as to not miss any important developments. In my own sick way I am addicted to her. She's so interesting. She's a puzzle we're all trying to figure out. I know more about her than I do about the people vying to control the country for the next four years. Britney for president.