School has commenced and there is no evidence of a summer fling.

Funny, isn't it. When you most want something you can never find it.

So, the guy who used to be my boyfriend came over after I moved in. He sat on my new bed and we spoke of impending classes and football games. I hadn't really planned how we'd bring up the issue of our togetherness, but I had to know and I had to be blunt with it, so I was. We both agreed to engage in something neither of us had ever done: we're in relationship lingo. We're not dating but we're not completely apart. When we're together, we're together; when we're apart we may do as we please. I like it this way. I see a lot less of him so I appreciate the time we do have together, plus I'm free to roam where I may. I am unsure of how long this will last. We're not that kind of couple, not the kind who can causally coast by. I think he will be the first to crack and in a way I want him to, I want him to be the one to end it. But I don't want to be without him because I am fond of him, I admire him, but I'm not passionate for him. I told him that if he was still game in five or six years that we could get married. He agreed with an easy laugh, the kind you make when you're not serious.

We've spent a few nights together and he was the first I called after my new internship. When I sense things are going back to the way they were I ignore him for a bit. It's not that I dislike being with him; I like being with him so much that if it were up to me, he'd be over every night and my social life would suffer greatly. I want to meet someone else but I'm skeptical to give that much of myself to anyone else again. Being in a relationship was draining and time consuming, and now I just want something cheery and light. I want the frozen yogurt of ice cream sundaes. Ok, that was a stupid analogy. I just don't feel like trying anymore.