. . . as Russ always says . . .

I'm feeling positively invigorated. I remember this same sensation from the summer after my mother died; I didn't feel whole again until after we had gone on vacation (to Door County, another dazzler of a trip). This year, too, I feel as if the trip to Arizona has finally washed away the after-effects of caring for Jackie. I feel optimistic again, and again I feel part of the world of the living . . . It's just hard to explain. Death casts a miasma, is all I can say.

For me the best part of the trip was definitely the quality family time. For some reason, I need to go on vacation to recharge my "family" batteries; maybe it's because the kids are older, and into their own lives so much . . . we really have to fight to make family time at home. I'm going to try to think of more ways to engineer this in the coming months. Maybe a video night? A rummy night? Surely we can do something.

And I have to admit, reluctantly, that the calmer atmosphere in the house has been a welcome relief to me. Without the big dog here, there's far less dirt, far less hair, and far less disruption. Wally hardly barks at all; his focus is on us, so he seldom sits gazing out the window as he used to do, barking at every perceived provocation . . . I could almost feel shallow about this; I'm not a particularly good housekeeper, by any stretch, but the level of chaos we had before was really getting to me. I would indeed feel shallow if I didn't think that the stress was making me less able to handle the other stresses of family life - ie, teenagers. People before dogs, I say . . . which is exactly the opposite of what Louise says, which is partly why William is better off with her. Still, it rubs. I know, somewhere, we're accumulating Karma Points for this - just as I allegedly accumulated them for taking care of Jackie, or so I was told - and I have to say, I feel the same about both situations: I'm about ready for someone ELSE to accumulate Karma Points by doing something Really Cool for ME.

But still. The house has been downright restful . . . I threw some rugs in the wash a few days ago, and finally got around to washing them today, and in the intervening time, no dirt seems to have accumulated on the floors . . . Maybe we'll do without the rugs. It will be a wonder to think in terms other than Defensive Decorating . . .

I spent a good long time today at the pool, working on my syllabus for the First Year Writing classes I've got. I have a good bit blocked out; I think tomorrow I'll be ready to tackle the calendar and the syllabus per se. My goal is to get everything done for the syllabi for the two different preparations (to teach four classes) by the middle of the week. Then I want to do as much other work (devising reading quizzes, coming up with in-class activities) as I can between now and the 23rd, when I have to go in for orientation activities. Perhaps I will feel differently soon, but I think I've learned a LOT about time management - and about a work ethic - over the last few years at Pharmacy. I think I have my feet much more on the ground than I used to, and I am really looking forward to starting the new semester.

Still, it feels like a different planet than it did before we left for Arizona . . .

(And Steph and Patrick are now well and truly married. Congratulations!!!! That's a new planet of a different sort . . . )