Urg. It's a gloomy, rainy, windy Monday morning . . . the only saving grace is that it's warm outside. I'm feeling a tad on the discouraged side this morning. I really Went Off My Diet in a big way this weekend - yesterday I pretty much subsisted on chocolate and butterscotch chip cookies in various states of doneness from batter to beater to bowl to cookie; Em made a few batches for her boyfriend, so there were plenty around . . . Today I stepped on the scale to discover that I'd gained 2.5 pounds, which puts me 3.5 above my "low." Why is it that two days of eating like a fat person will put on two pounds, which it will then take three weeks of eating like a skinny person to take off? There's some cosmic injustice there. Makes me feel like I have simply bumped up against some physical limitation that wasn't there ten years ago . . .

And I've decided not to train for Team in Training. My initial fundraising efforts netted far, far less than I anticipated they would, which means (as I said earlier) that I will have to devote much more time to fundraising than I had planned on doing. I suppose I shouldn't be surprised by that. I don't want to spend the next few months working hard at this, only to discover at the last minute that I fall short of my goal (and therefore have to pay the balance myself). I feel kinda bad about this - chiefly because I have no reason to train so hard now - but I think I'll make myself crazy if I try to work and train and fundraise and hang out with my family and do all the tasks that are part of family life . . . Still, this also makes me feel like I've bumped up against some kind of limitation, like I don't have a wide enough social circle to really be able to cast a net.

So I'm feeling pretty limited this morning.

The school server is runnning *really* slowly this morning, at least at this remove . . . so although I'd planned to do some work from home, I suppose I'd better get myself out the door and on the highway. At least the roads are wet but not icy. And I'm sure that once I get to work I'll feel much better, because I know where my limits lie, and they do not lie within the scope of my job . . . that, at least, I know I'm good at.

More when the sun shines . . .