What Holiday Candy are You
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Which holiday floats your boat in regards to candy consumption?
Do you harvest the candy corn of Halloween?
Do you eat the peepers off of sugar covered marshmallow bunnies at Easter?
Do you give your love little wafer hearts with two worded messages spelled out on them?
Do you enjoy the duality of eating a chocolate covered cherry, with the taste of a previously eaten candy cane still residing in your mouth?
Halloween isn't bad. With childhood, you spend most of the evening burning off enought calories to offset the near infinite supply of candy that you tricked and treated yourself to. So with Halloween, you have at least some cause and effect. You exercise, then you eat.
But as far as Halloween candy goes, there really isn't that much that is altogether unique. A candy bar is a candy bar is a candy bar whether it comes in long form, or bite sized fun packs. A Reeses Cup is a Reeses Cup. It doesn't matter if it comes from the store or if it comes from your trick or treat sack. Candy Corn in the shape of pumpkins is about as unique as it gets for Halloween. Other than that, there really isn't a lot of originality for Halloween. Let's face it, sans costume, Halloween is nothing more than going to your neighbor's houses to retrieve the same types of candy you can get at your local 7-11.
I'm not a big fan of Christmas candies. When did it become the tradition to eat minty flavored candies during the Holiday season? Everything is minty. I swear, by the time New Years rolls around, I'm pissing red and white swirls. Christmas candy really is insignificant isn't it? You have stockings, that's about it. For some reason, my parents always put a new toothbrush in my stocking right on top of the leftover Halloween candy that they're trying desperately to get rid of.
Valentines Day has some pretty good candy. It's unique in both it's presentation, as well as it's variety. You don't just have 3 Musketeers and Snickers loaded everywhere, you instead of the Russel Stover and Whitman wheels with every kind of chocolate and cream stuffing imaginable. That's the way I want my chocolate. With a map. And with as few pieces of coconut stuffed chocolates as possible. I hate that feeling of not knowing what you're biting into. You think you're getting some kind of maple filled goodie, but it instead turns out to be some kind of weird hazlenut meets Mocha hybrid. Biting into chocolate and not knowing what you're getting is like expecting to drink water, and getting battery acid instead. It's a shock to the system.
And I'd be remiss if I didn't mention those little Necco candy hearts with the little expressions written on them. The hearts have little cute sayings written on them. Like "Be Mine" and "I Love You." The best hearts have their own little short hand that would put any chatroom or text message to say. "Me and U 4-Ever" and "C Me L8er" are but a few gems that you'll see on the pastel colored hearts.
Being the ad wizards that they are, Necco always sells their boxes of wafer hearts as a multi-pack. You can rarely buy just one pack at a time, which can be a bit of a mixed blessing. If you bought just one box, then you'd realize that one box is really all the Necoo wafers that you'll need. But because they are multi-packaged, you have one box for Valentines Day, one box for your junk drawer, one box for your desk at work, one box for your glove compartment...
My personal favorite holiday candy is Easter candy. Every piece of candy is original. Whether it be chocolate bunnies, maple cream filled eggs, Cadbury Eggs with white and yellow filling, or everyone's favorite; peeps, Easter Candy by far takes the crown of best Holiday candy. It all tastes good and it's all presented in a clever way. I mean, who doesn't like the little green plastic hay that comes in Easter Baskets. You know you like finding that hay in your carpet come August. Easter candy just rules.
That...
and for those of you who take Lent and give up Chocolate for 40 days and 40 nights, Easter is the ultimate indulge candy day.
If I was a lawyer, I'd say case closed. :-)
matt out
Do you harvest the candy corn of Halloween?
Do you eat the peepers off of sugar covered marshmallow bunnies at Easter?
Do you give your love little wafer hearts with two worded messages spelled out on them?
Do you enjoy the duality of eating a chocolate covered cherry, with the taste of a previously eaten candy cane still residing in your mouth?
Halloween isn't bad. With childhood, you spend most of the evening burning off enought calories to offset the near infinite supply of candy that you tricked and treated yourself to. So with Halloween, you have at least some cause and effect. You exercise, then you eat.
But as far as Halloween candy goes, there really isn't that much that is altogether unique. A candy bar is a candy bar is a candy bar whether it comes in long form, or bite sized fun packs. A Reeses Cup is a Reeses Cup. It doesn't matter if it comes from the store or if it comes from your trick or treat sack. Candy Corn in the shape of pumpkins is about as unique as it gets for Halloween. Other than that, there really isn't a lot of originality for Halloween. Let's face it, sans costume, Halloween is nothing more than going to your neighbor's houses to retrieve the same types of candy you can get at your local 7-11.
I'm not a big fan of Christmas candies. When did it become the tradition to eat minty flavored candies during the Holiday season? Everything is minty. I swear, by the time New Years rolls around, I'm pissing red and white swirls. Christmas candy really is insignificant isn't it? You have stockings, that's about it. For some reason, my parents always put a new toothbrush in my stocking right on top of the leftover Halloween candy that they're trying desperately to get rid of.
Valentines Day has some pretty good candy. It's unique in both it's presentation, as well as it's variety. You don't just have 3 Musketeers and Snickers loaded everywhere, you instead of the Russel Stover and Whitman wheels with every kind of chocolate and cream stuffing imaginable. That's the way I want my chocolate. With a map. And with as few pieces of coconut stuffed chocolates as possible. I hate that feeling of not knowing what you're biting into. You think you're getting some kind of maple filled goodie, but it instead turns out to be some kind of weird hazlenut meets Mocha hybrid. Biting into chocolate and not knowing what you're getting is like expecting to drink water, and getting battery acid instead. It's a shock to the system.
And I'd be remiss if I didn't mention those little Necco candy hearts with the little expressions written on them. The hearts have little cute sayings written on them. Like "Be Mine" and "I Love You." The best hearts have their own little short hand that would put any chatroom or text message to say. "Me and U 4-Ever" and "C Me L8er" are but a few gems that you'll see on the pastel colored hearts.
Being the ad wizards that they are, Necco always sells their boxes of wafer hearts as a multi-pack. You can rarely buy just one pack at a time, which can be a bit of a mixed blessing. If you bought just one box, then you'd realize that one box is really all the Necoo wafers that you'll need. But because they are multi-packaged, you have one box for Valentines Day, one box for your junk drawer, one box for your desk at work, one box for your glove compartment...
My personal favorite holiday candy is Easter candy. Every piece of candy is original. Whether it be chocolate bunnies, maple cream filled eggs, Cadbury Eggs with white and yellow filling, or everyone's favorite; peeps, Easter Candy by far takes the crown of best Holiday candy. It all tastes good and it's all presented in a clever way. I mean, who doesn't like the little green plastic hay that comes in Easter Baskets. You know you like finding that hay in your carpet come August. Easter candy just rules.
That...
and for those of you who take Lent and give up Chocolate for 40 days and 40 nights, Easter is the ultimate indulge candy day.
If I was a lawyer, I'd say case closed. :-)
matt out
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