The Set-up: So I went away this past weekend, 'cause the Spouse's parents were celebrating their 61st anniversary, and all three of their kids (and their spouses) decided to go to Cannon Beach for a weekend of chilly ocean breezes, expensive meals and touristy shopping.

'Cause that's what people do.

Problem: I wasn't feeling all that great anyway, and played a round of "Get Rid of this Migraine" on Thursday night, but was recovered enough to make the 4+ hour drive to the beach. I've recently started a new drug, one that was supposed to have few to no side effects, for my chronic, icky pain . . . which the back surgery didn't take care of, damn it all. And I got fitted with a TENS unit, which is also not supposed to have side effects.

Introduction of Bigger Problem: I got wicked sick on Saturday night, while at the most expensive restaurant in town, and had to leave without eating any of my entree. "Wicked sick" in this instance means blinding headache, fever and chills, and projectile vomiting, the latter appropriately disposed of in the ladies room, and later on, in the hotel bathroom.

Introduction of Wackiness: So we left the coast early, and I tried really hard not to puke during the drive home; was mostly successful. Now I'm sipping on gingerale, with all the bubbles stirred out, and may even work up to dry toast tomorrow. But my brain insists on wondering . . . what made me ill?

This is where Google comes in. As I'm here to tell you, you should never type in symptoms in google and do a search, because you will learn that you have food poisoning, malaria, meningitis, a super cool migraine, or maybe even a brain tumor. But it could be just a side effect of the super new drug I started.

I'm just saying.