My uncle once: told me that being left-handed was a special thing… and Uncle T is always right.

Never in my life: have I tried any illegal drugs, or even smoked a cigarette. True ‘dat.

High school was: pretty good by my senior year.

I will never forget: the weekend R and I got engaged, our wedding, the birth of C, graduating from seminary, preaching at mondo youth conference

I once met: Sting

Once at a bar: in Geneva, I led several seminary classmates in a round of lemon drops.

By noon I'm usually: ready for lunch and a catnap. I usually get the former by 1 p.m., but the latter eludes me, except some Fridays.

Last night: I did not get enough sleep.

If only I had: more sleep.

Next time I go to church: will be a 12-hour day, easy—beginning with staff meeting and ending with session meeting.

When I turn my head left: I see the treadmill that has stood idle during my first trimester.

When I turn my head right: I see the right surround speaker mounted on the wall.

You know when I'm lying when: ????

Every day I think about: how blessed I feel. Really.

By this time next year: I will have two kids and exponential stress.

I have a hard time understanding: how anyone could hurt a child.

If I ever go back to school I'll: surprise nobody.

You know I like you when: you genuinely make me laugh.

If I won an award the first person I'd thank is: R (duh)

My ideal breakfast is: buttermilk pancakes, maple syrup, sausage patties, two eggs over hard, and fresh-squeezed orange juice

A song I love, but do not have is: Amy Ray’s “Let It Ring”

If you visit my hometown, I suggest: not getting in the natives’ way, or at least, steering clear of Dickie.

Why won't anyone: figure out this whole dependence on foreign oil thing?

If you spend the night at my house: you have a nice spacious basement all to yourself (including our only television with various accoutrements)

I'd stop my wedding for: a stampeding herd of bison?

The world could do without: pollution and poverty.

I'd rather lick the belly of a cockroach than: watch most reality TV.

Paper clips are more useful than: …sliced bread?

If I do anything well: …um …answering this question wouldn’t be it.

And by the way: how are you?

The last time I was drunk: see “lemon drops,” above.