Once upon a time there was an intrepid southerner named ScarLeg O’Hara. The nickname was bestowed when ScarLeg was found to have a hip that was out of joint and had to be surgically replaced. As any self-respecting pirate knows, a cut like that leaves a scar.

Soon after the hip replacement, ScarLeg was up and about and in true pirate fashion, decided that a trip to far-off lands was in order. Perhaps a week or so tracking lions would be just what would refresh a pirate who had had enough of high winds, rain and water. Reservations made, ScarLeg set off to explore wildest Africa.

Alas, fate intervened and our brave traveler fell and broke the other hip. After many eventful and interesting days, ScarLeg returned home and got a longer, uglier red scar on the other leg, just to prove pirates are mean and nasty.

But you probably have guessed the next chapter by now. Nothing daunted, in true pirate fashion, ScarLeg soon was up and about, planning forays into foreign lands once again, not a bit intimidated by the vagaries of fate. Some say they observed ScarLeg raise a fist to the sky and say, "As God is my witness, I'll never be bored again!"

Moral of the story: When staying home is both boring and dangerous, sally forth!